Sleepwalk's "Watching Wrestling With Non-Fans"

sleepwalk

pork roll, egg and cheese belt
Platinum Member
Joined
Nov 20, 2002
Messages
11,885
Reaction score
8,847
Taking note of the reactions of common folk to the goings on in pro wrestling... you know... for science.

The players thus far:


My long-suffering wife-

Level of fandom: Miniscule. Got picture taken with Macho Man once during spring break. Knew him as "The Slim Jim guy."

Best friend-
Level of fandom: Used to watch but grew out of it during the Attitude Era. His wife watches Divas on E! and he'll watch a few minutes while flipping through the channels.

My dad-
Level of fandom: Thinks wrestling is fake and gay. Respects the athletic stuff and hot females. Entertained at base level by chair shots and table bumps.
 
My wife on...

Bayley: "I don't like her."
"Why not?"
"She's too "Oh, I'm a sweet girl. Like me! Please like me!"
"Hmm..."
"She looks fucking stupid."

Nia Jax: "Whoa! That's a big bitch!"

The Wyatt Family (Randy Orton version):
"Is that one guy just there so they have a hot guy in their group?"
"Which one?"
"Are you serious?"

Alexa Bliss: "I should probably be a jealous bitch but I like her. She's got little legs like me. She just tried to cheat but couldn't reach the ropes."
 
Last edited:
My dad on...

Chris Jericho:
"Is this fa**ot with the scarf a good guy or a bad guy?"
"Right now, he's a bad guy."
"Does he have that scarf when he's a good guy?"
"Nope."
"I didn't think so."

Braun Strowman:
"Is that The Mountain?"
"No. He does strongman games, though."
"I think that's The Mountain."
"Dad, it's not The Mountain."
"We'll see about that."

Nikki Bella:
"Holy shit! Who's this? They let her dance like that?"
"That's Nikki Bella One half of the Bella Twins."
"Where's her twin?"
"Out pregnant."
"Good for her. When's this one gonna get pregnant."
"Probably never. Her boyfriend is like the Hulk Hogan of this era and says he doesn't want to go through marriage again and doesn't want kids. They have the other girl wrestlers give her shit for it."
"What?! They can't do that!... Nah. I don't like that. That's not fucking right. I don't care if it's fake or not."

Brock Lesnar:
"Brock Lesnar's doing wrasslin' now?"
"Yeah. He did wrestling first."
"Oh yeah. That's right... Hurtin'."

John Cena:
"You said they tested for steroids now? Bullshit. They ain't testin' this guy."
 
Last edited:
My dad on...

Chris Jericho: "Is this fa**ot with the scarf a good guy or a bad guy?"
"Right now, he's a bad guy."
"Does he have that scarf when he's a good guy?"
"Nope."
"I didn't think so."

Braun Strowman: "Is that The Mountain?"
"No. He does strongman games, though."
"I think that's The Mountain."
"Dad, it's not The Mountain."
"We'll see about that."

Lol your dad is a fucking G bro
 
My best friend on...

Charlotte: "Ric Flair's daughter would get it and then, while she's passed out, I'm gonna grab some pruning shears and clip that wart off her chin."

On Charlotte vs Sasha: "Oh daaamn! She knocked her weave out of place!"

On Natalya vs Nikki: "Oh shit. They went there? Thats... that's pretty harsh. Kinda uncomfortable watching even. Why would they do this?"

On Shinsuke Nakamura: "What's the deal with gay Japanese Michael Jackson Thriller guy?"
"They love him because of his entrance and because he goes hard style."
"So he hits people for real... like you're not supposed to do? That's fucking retarded."

On The Miz: "Damn. Real World Miz got with Maryse or is that scripted."
"It's real."
"Good for him. Douchbag but good for him."
 
Last edited:
The KO vs Roman feud according to...

My wife: "How is this guy going to beat Khal Drogo?"
"He's going to cheat and get his friend involved."
"Isn't he the good guy?"
"No, he's the bad guy."
"Then why did they cheer for him and boo the big muscle guy?"
"It's a long story."
"Nevermind. I don't care enough."

My dad: "Where's this big Indian guy from?"
"He's Samoan. Played linebacker at Georgia Tech. His whole family's full of wrestlers."
"He should be wiping the floor with this creampuff. What is he? McMahon's nephew?"

My best friend: "Okay. Why is Mexican Thor fighting [my fat nerdy cousin?]"
"Triple H screwed him out of the title by attacking him our of nowhere and letting Owens pin him."
"Why isn't he beating his ass, taking his lunch money and fucking his mom? Because that's what this looks like it's going to play out."
 
Pretty sure most of these did not happen, you're just getting creative....

....but they're funny, keep it up.
 
Pretty sure most of these did not happen, you're just getting creative....

....but they're funny, keep it up.

Done from memory over past weeks so... there may be some embellishment. Blame it on Mandela effect.

And I'll be sure to keep it up. The Rumble's coming!
 
Bumping this thread after a 'Mania party at my house. Our regular watching crew was there. One guy's wife showed up later and spent a lot of the time petting and talking to my dog. My cousin brought his fiancee, however, and, despite the fact that he's the marky markiest out of all of us (to the point that it's considered a character trait) she doesnt quite get wrestling.

Cousin's fiancee on...

The booking prediction sheets we make up for the Big Four PPV's...
"What does 'turn heel' mean?"
"For John Cena proposing to Nikki, are we betting what we want or what we think will happen?"
"In the part where it says 'surprise appearances,' what is 'HBK?'"

On Kevin Owens...
Her: "Kevin Owens is the one with the dark hair? He doesn't look like he's in very good shape."
Cuz: "That's the whole point of him. He doesn't look like a muscular athletic guy but then he goes out there and beats those guys."
Me: *shaking my head and mouthing "No" to her*
Cuz (after catching me): *mouths "Fuck you" at me* "Look at me. No, seriously, look at me." *mouths "Fuck. You." at me and points for emphasis.

On Bayley...
Me: "My wife doesn't like her."
Her: "Yeah, no, me neither. I don't know why, but no."
Me: "Wife mistook her for AJ at first but still doesn't like her because she, and I quote, 'looks fucking stupid.'"
Her: "Yeah. I think that's it. Which one is AJ?"
Cuz: "She was before we got together I think. You would have hated her."

On Roman Reigns vs Undertaker...
Some of the guys at the party grumbling about how they think Roman goes over and they hope not.
Her: "How old is Roman?"
Someone: "34? Wait googled it. 31."
Her: "Okay. So why do you think he isn't going to beat this Grampa? Seriously, it looks like he hurts just being there."
Cuz: "You know what? You just made the list!"
Her: "What list?" Engages other female in short convo on Roman's attractiveness level vs Randy Orton's.
 
Last edited:
LMAO. These are great. Personally, I can't watch wrestling, or MMA with non-fans.
 
I love watching wrestling with non fans they almost always say funny things.

My fave is my wife who constantly makes fun of dean ambroses jeggings
 
I feel like I have similar conversations with my wife while we're watching.
 
My dad on...

Chris Jericho: "Is this fa**ot with the scarf a good guy or a bad guy?"
"Right now, he's a bad guy."
"Does he have that scarf when he's a good guy?"
"Nope."
"I didn't think so."

Braun Strowman: "Is that The Mountain?"
"No. He does strongman games, though."
"I think that's The Mountain."
"Dad, it's not The Mountain."
"We'll see about that."


I laughed pretty hard at these two. "We'll see about that," in particular got me.
 
... Engages other female in short convo on Roman's attractiveness level vs Randy Orton's...

Quite curious what the end result was of that conversation, not gonna lie.

This is some great stuff, keep it up!
 
Nikki Bella: "Holy shit! Who's this? They let her dance like that?"
"That's Nikki Bella One half of the Bella Twins."
"Where's her twin?"
"Out pregnant."
"Good for her. When's this one gonna get pregnant."
"Probably never. Her boyfriend is like the Hulk Hogan of this era and says he doesn't want to go through marriage again and doesn't want kids. They have the other girl wrestlers give her shit for it."
"What?! They can't do that!... Nah. I don't like that. That's not fucking right. I don't care if it's fake or not."

Fucking LOL :p
 
Quite curious what the end result was of that conversation, not gonna lie.

This is some great stuff, keep it up!

I think it went along the lines of both being attractive but the one girl saying that Randy didn't do it for he because he "seemed older" (she's still in her 20s) and a segue into George Clooney in terms of attractive older guys.

I may see about getting my father-in-law or sister-in-law to sit in on RAW tomorrow as I'm down visiting them. If I tell them that it's "for science" I might make it happen.
 
I laughed pretty hard at these two. "We'll see about that," in particular got me.

I actually caught myself using that line this past week involving water in our basement.
 
I'll watch 80s/90s wrestling with anyone. If they watch a whole Raw from like 98 by then end there will be something they liked whether it was Austin being a badass, Road Dogg being funny, Sable getting her tits out, Foley going through a table... I wouldn't watch the modern stuff with anyone because I don't watch it myself.
 
My wife on...

Bayley: "I don't like her."
"Why not?"
"She's too "Oh, I'm a sweet girl. Like me! Please like me!"
"Hmm..."
"She looks fucking stupid."

Nia Jax: "Whoa! That's a big bitch!"

The Wyatt Family: "Is that one guy just there so they have a hot guy in their group?"
"Which one?"
"Are you serious?"

Alexa Bliss: "I should probably be a jealous bitch but I like her. She's got little legs like me. She just tried to cheat but couldn't reach the ropes."

So my girlfriend hates Bayley for the same exact reason. She likes Nia and Randy as well.But she can't stand Bayley and her "hugger" gimmick.
 
Back
Top