Could a person survive eating nothing but Jordan almonds?

[FacePunch]

My bad bro I was thinking different kind of almonds




Fucking bomb!

Yea, I like the wasabi ones and the honey roasted ones. I pretty much just eat almonds for breakfast.

Those do NOT work well as suppositories though.

 

[scorpipede]

Because I think I'm about to try. Goddamnit they're so good. I can't stop eating them.





Follow-up question: If you ate nothing but Jordan almonds would your teeth eventually crumble into useless bits of mess, or would you develop newly-evolved next-gen indestructoteeth?




Follow follow up up question: If you (I) do destroy your (my) teeth into crumbly bits of mess eating Jordan almonds could you survive just gargling them around your mouth until they dissolve and you could get enough nutrition there? Do Jordan almonds even dissolve?















@Clippy

I think the answer to all the questions in this post is yes.

 

[Ceez]

Yea, I like the wasabi ones and the honey roasted ones. I pretty much just eat almonds for breakfast.

Those do NOT work well as suppositories though.

Don't be such a pussy

 

[Thrawn33]

Actually this whole idea started as a way to get vegan poontang. This is my vegan expression and you should check your carnivorous privilege you savage murderer.

You sell out your base nature for poon?

 

[FacePunch]

Does this post or the op have pictures I'm not seeing or do you just like using large spacing?

I like using spacing.











For emphasis.








Jordan almonds:

Bask in their pastel-colored peacefulness.

 

[FacePunch]

You sell out your base nature for poon?

I'm willing to try, but this discussion is academic.

 

[FacePunch]

Don't be such a pussy

You ASSHOLE!






You burnt, burnt asshole.

 

[Thrawn33]

I'm willing to try, but this discussion is academic.

You shame your ancestors.

 

[FacePunch]

You shame your ancestors.

Look man - I swiped right on some hot vegan poon, and now I'm just trying to work out the rest of my life. My ancestors are dead and they would never shame poon.

 

[CoolB]

LOL nice touch.... with the jab!

 

[splendica]

My bad bro I was thinking different kind of almonds




Fucking bomb!

@FacePunch

If you eat too many of these (the hickory smoked ones are amazing too), your anus will die a slow painful, endless-feeling death.

This isn't a joke. I had a couple of cans of this over a weekend, and it felt like someone was pulling razor wire through me a couple of days later. One of the most painful and seemingly endless ordeals I've ever suffered through. As bad as breaking my wrist and ankle. Maybe worse.

 

[Thrawn33]

Look man - I swiped right on some hot vegan poon, and now I'm just trying to work out the rest of my life. My ancestors are dead and they would never shame poon.

You are placing it on a pedestal higher than yourself.

You duck a challenge.

if you smash without converting you are strong

If you convert the vegan back to what nature intended you will be legend

 

[Ceez]

@FacePunch

If you eat too many of these (the hickory smoked ones are amazing too), your anus will die a slow painful, endless-feeling death.

This isn't a joke. I had a couple of cans of this over a weekend, and it felt like someone was pulling razor wire through me a couple of days later. One of the most painful and seemingly endless ordeals I've ever suffered through. As bad as breaking my wrist and ankle. Maybe worse.

I eat these like candy never had that problem. But then I have the stomach of a (*whispers so @UL and @phunky won't hear) goat.

 

[splendica]

I eat these like candy never had that problem. But then I have the stomach of a (*whispers so @UL and @phunky won't hear) goat.

It's the salt and that the almonds don't digest completely so come out in hard, sharp chunks. If you eat enough of them you'll experience the pleasure lol.

 

[MadSquabbles500]

Have you tried Wonderful Almonds?

The company is owned by this guy named Stu Resnik

This is good little docu about him and his company



Where do these Jordan almonds come from the country of Jordan? They too are primarily a desert. I wonder how they get their water.

 

[FacePunch]

You are placing it on a pedestal higher than yourself.

You duck a challenge.

if you smash without converting you are strong

If you convert the vegan back to what nature intended you will be legend

Oh, she'll be eating meat alright.

 

[FacePunch]

@FacePunch

If you eat too many of these (the hickory smoked ones are amazing too), your anus will die a slow painful, endless-feeling death.

This isn't a joke. I had a couple of cans of this over a weekend, and it felt like someone was pulling razor wire through me a couple of days later. One of the most painful and seemingly endless ordeals I've ever suffered through. As bad as breaking my wrist and ankle. Maybe worse.

 

[Grrrr]

My bad bro I was thinking different kind of almonds




Fucking bomb!

Had to Google Jordan almonds...
No thanks Jeff
Blue diamond almonds are glorious though

 

[FacePunch]

Have you tried Wonderful Almonds?

The company is owned by this guy named Stu Resnik

This is good little docu about him and his company



Where do these Jordan almonds come from the country of Jordan? They too are primarily a desert. I wonder how they get their water.

I'm pretty sure that when SJWs are talking about how Islam had so many great contributions to science and society and art and whatnot throughout history, they're just talking about Jordan almonds.

 

[Thrawn33]

@FacePunch

If you eat too many of these (the hickory smoked ones are amazing too), your anus will die a slow painful, endless-feeling death.

This isn't a joke. I had a couple of cans of this over a weekend, and it felt like someone was pulling razor wire through me a couple of days later. One of the most painful and seemingly endless ordeals I've ever suffered through. As bad as breaking my wrist and ankle. Maybe worse.

The wasabi ones are my crack.