i have some bad news

RockstarChris

RockstarChris

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i have some bad news

Im getting a job.

I just updated my resume and how do i say i did nothing for 5 years lol
 
I don't think the manager at Taco Bell gives a shit about what you've done for the past 5 years.
 
Tell them you were volunteering with the Obogo people from the Southern Saharan wetlands.
 
In all honesty resume gaps are tough to fill. I had one for 4 months where i was jobless, I just said I was travelling. Have you got a buddy with a business who can say you worked there?
 
Just say aliens abducted you for that time period
 
What kind of job are you going for?
 
"Entrepreneur" or "self-employed", just like all the unemployed people on dating apps.
 
What you been doing the last 5 years?
 
that’s a long time to explain. What were you, in fact, doing?
 
I saw in a documentary that you can put "For 5 years you went kerawack on everyone's ass" and at least get a job with a catering company?
 
"i was in jail for attempted murder" , that will explain the unemployment thing

EDIT: erase the "attempted" part, you don't want to look like somebody that can't complete simple task at your new workplace
 
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