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- May 9, 2010
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Lol I wouldn't even walk 2 miles to get laid, let alone fap
This is going to sound absolutely ridiculous but I dont know who else to tell and I need to get this off my chest. I'm absolutely panicked right now. I feel like I might pass out.
I live by a decently sized woods, it is right behind my house. Its a big enough wooded area that there are certainly plenty of deer and stuff in there, but not big enough to where anyone intelligent would hunt as they would definitely get in big trouble hunting within city limits.
Anyways I was feeling kind of frisky, needing to fap one out and it hit me. I dont know where this idea came from, but it came. Its a nice day out so I figure, what the hell, I'm going to bust one out in the woods. Return to nature you know? Reconnect with the primal side.
So I go pretty deep into the woods, deep enough to where it was definitely not still on my property. Probably about 2 miles in. I start the job when half way in something catches my eye in a tree. I immediately know what it is, and upon closer inspection I verify. A fucking trail cam. Its secured to the tree in some kind of homemade box with a lock. I cant get it off with out breaking the box.
Looking around I find 2 more for a total of 3. Two of them were essentially pointed right at me. I would smash them to pieces and steal the memory card, but looking up one Amazon that resembles them entirely it seems these fucking things can stream/store directly to computers and phones they are connected to!
WHAT DO I DO
Go back tonight with a ski mask on and smash the fuck out of the cameras and get the memory cards.
Duh.
Even a TV Guide is better than nothing. Lol
Damn. How old are you, brah?
You told Sherdog to set their YouTube search filter to, "pervert masturbates in the forest" for the next week.This is going to sound absolutely ridiculous but I dont know who else to tell and I need to get this off my chest. I'm absolutely panicked right now. I feel like I might pass out.
I live by a decently sized woods, it is right behind my house. Its a big enough wooded area that there are certainly plenty of deer and stuff in there, but not big enough to where anyone intelligent would hunt as they would definitely get in big trouble hunting within city limits.
Anyways I was feeling kind of frisky, needing to fap one out and it hit me. I dont know where this idea came from, but it came. Its a nice day out so I figure, what the hell, I'm going to bust one out in the woods. Return to nature you know? Reconnect with the primal side.
So I go pretty deep into the woods, deep enough to where it was definitely not still on my property. Probably about 2 miles in. I start the job when half way in something catches my eye in a tree. I immediately know what it is, and upon closer inspection I verify. A fucking trail cam. Its secured to the tree in some kind of homemade box with a lock. I cant get it off with out breaking the box.
Looking around I find 2 more for a total of 3. Two of them were essentially pointed right at me. I would smash them to pieces and steal the memory card, but looking up one Amazon that resembles them entirely it seems these fucking things can stream/store directly to computers and phones they are connected to!
WHAT DO I DO
I jacked off in the woods once. The only thing that saw me was a fox. It sat there watching me the entire time.
Burn the entire forest down.
So now I will use this instead of 'If a tree falls in a forest and no one is around to hear it, does it make a sound??'