Bacon vs. Gravity

[mschatz]

I'm so pumped to have made the main event.

 

[Stonebreaker]

How the hell did erco get stuck as a ring girl? For that matter, I haven't seen Tamil around in a while....

WTF is an Inferno match?

The Mask Match made me laugh hard enough to snort my coffee.

Finnegan/Cap'n is going to need one hell of a catch weight.

Who the hell is Anarkix?

And where's Standard?

Hell, for that matter, is there going to be a referee, or is thing going to get real ugly in a hurry?

 

[Donut62]

Keith is the ref.

 

[mschatz]

How the hell did erco get stuck as a ring girl? For that matter, I haven't seen Tamil around in a while....

WTF is an Inferno match?

The Mask Match made me laugh hard enough to snort my coffee.

Finnegan/Cap'n is going to need one hell of a catch weight.

Who the hell is Anarkix?

And where's Standard?

Hell, for that matter, is there going to be a referee, or is thing going to get real ugly in a hurry?

Noob.

We need Asian ring girls. Hence, Erco.

Inferno match = firefighters. Duh.

Finn is about 220 I think. Capn's up to 205. Catch weight: 210

Anarxix is the velocity diet that ChaseG liked to pwn

 

[bacon]

This was put together in teh spirit of the squat comp. We sought zero approval from anyone.

 

[Stonebreaker]

We need Asian ring girls. Hence, Erco.

By that logic, you could have gone with Sonny. Neither is going to look very appealing in those bikinis.

Inferno match = firefighters. Duh.

I got the firefighter connection, I was more wondering if this was going to be a special rules match.

Finn is about 220 I think. Capn's up to 205. Catch weight: 210

Why the heck do I keep thinking that Alan is smaller than he is? This one could be interesting.

Anarxix is the velocity diet that ChaseG liked to pwn

Ah. Pity that Statisticool has left us. I can see the line forming for "fight the S&Per that you don't like but won't shut up."

I'm also thinking that a Standard/Lusst in a "Battle of the Mods" would be worth watching.

 

[vince89]

The Inferno Match is designed to prove which mans firefighting style is the strongest.

 

[enright3060]

Ah. Pity that Statisticool has left us. I can see the line forming for "fight the S&Per that you don't like but won't shut up."

I'll still fight Stat.

 

[Deleted member 130905]

Why wasn't I on the fucking card?

*plots revenge to spoil the fights*

 

[Stonebreaker]

Why wasn't I on the fucking card?

*plots revenge to spoil the fights*

So call somebody out: as far as I know, half the people on this card don't know that they've been named; pick somone you want to throw down with and put their name in.

I don't know if St Carnal's Xtreme Cagefighting was meant to be limited to pub regulars, but if we're broadening it out to the somewhat larger S&P community, I'll put Bubble Boy vs. Old Man in a S&P "master's match." You know, something for the TOTHO crowd. Old Man's going to have to play catch up in the training and conditioning department, but he's got time, I think.

I'm still for Standard vs Lusst in a battle of the Mostrous Mods, too. Fatty vs. Ascendant, perhaps. NK vs Fatkid, maybe? The possibilities are endless.

 

[thethirddiaz]

*Waits for bacon's soccer story*

 

[finnegan]

I asked for Standard a long, long time ago. We are pretty close to even in all categories except for Standard's longer training experience, and proximity to Brandon.

 

[Old Man]

I'm still for Standard vs Lusst in a battle of the Mostrous Mods, too. Fatty vs. Ascendant, perhaps. NK vs Fatkid, maybe? The possibilities are endless.

You're going to need some type of special titanium ring for these matches. Maybe a sumo dohyo would be best.

 

[bacon]

First half:

I played "right full back". The name made me laugh because I was a full back in HS (football, not futball) and I actually got to hit people.

My wife splained the rules to me on the way to the field and I just kinda winged it from there. I told "the sweeper" guy to let me know I'm doing it wrong. The very first time I touched the ball, I headed the fucker. It's a satisfying feeling to head butt a ball and watch it fly in the other direction. I've head butted a guy once and he just stood there and held his face. Headbutting balls makes you feel manly.

The ball came my way a few more times and I cleared it without any problems.

Score going into half time 2-0 us.

Second half:

Played the same position. same basic deal. Cleared the ball and covered anyone on my side like a fucking blanket.

The other team had a skinnier-than-me, little mouthy fucker on their team. He wasn't really talking shit to our team as much as he was to the refs. He caught the sweeper out of position and had a straight shot to the goal, but I caught him and he got tangled up in my feets and we both went down. This resulted in a penalty kick, but in this league, the girls have to make all the penatly kicks. Whatever. We were still ahead and at least the d-bag shit talker didn't score.

Had a breakaway up my side and a member of my team was yelling, "take the ball!" So I took it. I slid in and barely touched the guy, but I got a yellow card for "slide tackling". My rebuttle was, "But I didn't tackle him." Then the ref informed me that slide tackling, or attempting to, is a no-no in this league. My wife left that little tid bit out in the pre-game brief. I left the game. A few minutes later it was over. Final score 3-1 us.

Thoughts:
Soccer is pretty fun to play. As an adult, you don't really get many opportunities to run full speed. I like running full speed, therefore, this sport has potential. I don't really have any kind of desire (or skill) to be on the offensive side. I'd rather stay on D.

I'll have to get used to the contact restrictions. Earlier this same morning I was on a wrestling mat trying to choke people and break their limbs, then a few hours later, I'm carded for ATTEMPTING to touch a guy. Whatever. School starts again this week, so my sub grappling 3 times a week will go to one time a week for the rest of the month. After this month, I'll have to let it go completely. I can't afford to pay $125 a month for one session a week.


Cliff's notes: I suck at soccer but it's kinda fun.


EDIT:
I later found out that the skinny shit talker and the guy I "slide tackled" are both refs in our league. I am making teh friends and influencin peoples.

 

[thethirddiaz]

Thanks for the story. Good stuff.

You can hit people in soccer, legally, without getting in trouble, but you have to time it just right and lead with the shoulder. It becomes fun when you can do it right, but it is very easy to mes up and get there too early/late. And in recreational leagues (I'm assuming your is) refs tend to be more strict because 1) it is rec. and 2) they aren't very good refs.

 

[graedy]

I had pretty much the same experience when I played soccer for the hospital team a couple of weeks ago.
soccer is only fun when played on a small field in a hall.
And I agree: Tackling should be allowed.

 

[Barut]

First half:

I played "right full back". The name made me laugh because I was a full back in HS (football, not futball) and I actually got to hit people.

My wife splained the rules to me on the way to the field and I just kinda winged it from there. I told "the sweeper" guy to let me know I'm doing it wrong. The very first time I touched the ball, I headed the fucker. It's a satisfying feeling to head butt a ball and watch it fly in the other direction. I've head butted a guy once and he just stood there and held his face. Headbutting balls makes you feel manly.

The ball came my way a few more times and I cleared it without any problems.

Score going into half time 2-0 us.

Second half:

Played the same position. same basic deal. Cleared the ball and covered anyone on my side like a fucking blanket.

The other team had a skinnier-than-me, little mouthy fucker on their team. He wasn't really talking shit to our team as much as he was to the refs. He caught the sweeper out of position and had a straight shot to the goal, but I caught him and he got tangled up in my feets and we both went down. This resulted in a penalty kick, but in this league, the girls have to make all the penatly kicks. Whatever. We were still ahead and at least the d-bag shit talker didn't score.

Had a breakaway up my side and a member of my team was yelling, "take the ball!" So I took it. I slid in and barely touched the guy, but I got a yellow card for "slide tackling". My rebuttle was, "But I didn't tackle him." Then the ref informed me that slide tackling, or attempting to, is a no-no in this league. My wife left that little tid bit out in the pre-game brief. I left the game. A few minutes later it was over. Final score 3-1 us.

Thoughts:
Soccer is pretty fun to play. As an adult, you don't really get many opportunities to run full speed. I like running full speed, therefore, this sport has potential. I don't really have any kind of desire (or skill) to be on the offensive side. I'd rather stay on D.

I'll have to get used to the contact restrictions. Earlier this same morning I was on a wrestling mat trying to choke people and break their limbs, then a few hours later, I'm carded for ATTEMPTING to touch a guy. Whatever. School starts again this week, so my sub grappling 3 times a week will go to one time a week for the rest of the month. After this month, I'll have to let it go completely. I can't afford to pay $125 a month for one session a week.


Cliff's notes: I suck at soccer but it's kinda fun.


EDIT:
I later found out that the skinny shit talker and the guy I "slide tackled" are both refs in our league. I am making teh friends and influencin peoples.

Nice work.

Rec league soccer is fun because not everyone is a dive-taking pussy.

 

[bacon]

Only saw one dive, but it was a chic and she ran into my wife. Wife had the ball and was headed for the goal and the other girl just ran into her and fell down clutching her knee.

I think she was just a drama queen. She stayed on the ground for about 5 minuts, then just got up and walked off the field.

 

[Old Man]

a few hours later, I'm carded for ATTEMPTING to touch a guy.

I don't know a thing about soccer, but from your description I can only conclude that it is a game for little girls and pussies.

* realizes Sherdog is international *
* runs for cover *

 

[Stonebreaker]

As noted, this appears to be a recreational league.

Rec soccer has about slightly more resemblence to the sport as it is played internationally than flag football does to the NFL, but only by a bit.

No slide-tackling? Might as well tell the backs that they're not allowed to look at the ball....