Gym Idiots IX - Vibram's Edition!

Fucking hell I've underestimated the idiocy of the average gymgoer. First session in five years at a public gym, all at the same time: bitchpad squats above parallell, bosu ball lateral raises and shadowboxing w mean mug on. Three different individuals.

Gooby pls.
 
Fucking hell I've underestimated the idiocy of the average gymgoer. First session in five years at a public gym, all at the same time: bitchpad squats above parallell, bosu ball lateral raises and shadowboxing w mean mug on. Three different individuals.

Gooby pls.

Smith machine half squats with a pad are a weekly occurrence at my gym.
 
Smith machine half squats with a pad are a weekly occurrence at my gym.

Lucky you. I can count the number of people who squat in my gym (who doesn't compete in boxing or BJJ) on one hand.

Meanwhile, the seated chess press remains a crowd favourite :rolleyes:
 
Last week while squatting, I descended into the hole too fast and lost my balance. Had to dump the weights onto the safety bars.

The idiot part is when I clearly knew that the weight was too heavy for me to clean, not to mention I've never done it before, but I tried it anyways.
 
Not really idiots today, but just extremely loud for some reason. There were literally 4 different guys screaming at the same time, doing smith machine squats, lateral raises, curls, and upright rows.

It got to the point where everyone that wasn't shouting was just giving them odd stares.

Also, I had just finished benching and was about to do some rowing when a dude walks up to the area where people usually deadlift, do rows etc. (Mind you there isn't much space do them but there).

Anyways I go to the free area beside him and I'm just over come with the most rancid, disgusting smell of BO ever. Imagine the most sour, nasty smelling armpits... Now cover that with puke and vinegar and leave it in the sun all day. I'm usually good at just ignoring the smell but this time I actually gagged really hard. I almost threw up.. And that never happens to me.

I honestly questioned if the dude still had a functioning sense of smell, everyone in his vicinity was making "Wtf is that smell" faces, while he just nonchalantly does his RDL, supersetted with pull ups. I could see the mirror crying in pain from the stench.

I had to go and do some other assistance while I waited for the guy to leave the area.
 
A story from last week:

So I'm doing my overhead press. I was AMRAPing a mere 50kgs, as per my 5/3/1 prescription.

Whilst I'm doing my warm-up sets in the rack, I notice some guy next to me wearing JEANS, which he had hanging off his ass, a singlet, basketball kicks and a fucking backwards cap.

He also happens to have 50kg on the bar. Except he's doing quarter squats.

Every time he unracks the bar he grunts extremely loud. Every rep, he screams as if it were a grinder. I couldn't help but count the noises (and hence the reps). He did a set of 8.

True story.
 
A story from last week:

So I'm doing my overhead press. I was AMRAPing a mere 50kgs, as per my 5/3/1 prescription.

Whilst I'm doing my warm-up sets in the rack, I notice some guy next to me wearing JEANS, which he had hanging off his ass, a singlet, basketball kicks and a fucking backwards cap.

He also happens to have 50kg on the bar. Except he's doing quarter squats.

Every time he unracks the bar he grunts extremely loud. Every rep, he screams as if it were a grinder. I couldn't help but count the noises (and hence the reps). He did a set of 8.

True story.

Ha that reminds of a chick i used to see at the gym who i saw on a treadmill a couple of times in tight black pants and wedge heel shoes, like, going out at night for cocktails clothes.

Did you tell him to shut the fuck up?
 
I saw a girl squatting 70kg for sets of 5 to below full depth. I actually went over and told her she was awesome. I realised after, that I might now be known as "that creepy guy". So, gym idiot is me? Oops.
 
I saw a girl squatting 70kg for sets of 5 to below full depth. I actually went over and told her she was awesome. I realised after, that I might now be known as "that creepy guy". So, gym idiot is me? Oops.

Not if she asks you to spot her next time, nomsayin' ;)
 
I saw a girl squatting 70kg for sets of 5 to below full depth. I actually went over and told her she was awesome. I realised after, that I might now be known as "that creepy guy". So, gym idiot is me? Oops.

I guess it depends on how you say it. If she thinks you're weird then oh well.
 
I saw a girl squatting 70kg for sets of 5 to below full depth. I actually went over and told her she was awesome. I realised after, that I might now be known as "that creepy guy". So, gym idiot is me? Oops.

Na, you complimented for doing a rare thing.

In my experience, ladies like to be complimented in the gym.
 
Not really a gym idiot story but one that can potentially prevent one.

Our gym has banned muscle shirts that are cut too much. You can have sleeveless but not the low cut show off your hipster scripture tatoo on your torso kind...
 
Not really a gym idiot story but one that can potentially prevent one.

Our gym has banned muscle shirts that are cut too much. You can have sleeveless but not the low cut show off your hipster scripture tatoo on your torso kind...

Gyms should ban fat women from wearing yoga pants and sports bras instead of a muscle shirt cut too low. Anyhow, aside from looking like a weiner I don't really see a big deal with someone wearing a shirt as you described. People wear strange shit at gyms all the time. This little scrawny guy at the gym I go to always wears matching sweatband, wristbands, gloves, and socks. He must have a drawer full of different colors. He looks funny as hell but he thinks he looks cool. I just laugh to myself and go on about my business. Who knows, maybe he laughs at me because I always have chalk all over my shorts and shirt.
 
Gyms should ban fat women from wearing yoga pants and sports bras instead of a muscle shirt cut too low. Anyhow, aside from looking like a weiner I don't really see a big deal with someone wearing a shirt as you described. People wear strange shit at gyms all the time. This little scrawny guy at the gym I go to always wears matching sweatband, wristbands, gloves, and socks. He must have a drawer full of different colors. He looks funny as hell but he thinks he looks cool. I just laugh to myself and go on about my business. Who knows, maybe he laughs at me because I always have chalk all over my shorts and shirt.

Lulz at the drawer thing. I think the same thing. People at the Y (Where they banned the shirts) are always decked out in matching shit. I can't say I pay too much attention to what I wear.

I did get asked to leave because I had an Iron maiden tshirt from Dance of Death tour with a nipple showing... its actually not that noticeable...
 
Black pants; go fine with every other piece of clothing.
 
Lulz at the drawer thing. I think the same thing. People at the Y (Where they banned the shirts) are always decked out in matching shit. I can't say I pay too much attention to what I wear.

I did get asked to leave because I had an Iron maiden tshirt from Dance of Death tour with a nipple showing... its actually not that noticeable...
Guy has sets of blk, yellow, white, etc. I don't notice what most wear but one just doesn't miss a 125 lb guy decked out in sweatbands. Most of my gym shirts have holes. Old shirts are more comfortable. I would have been a tad angry if asked to leave for that.
 
One of my friends just posted this on facebook. Not sure who's the idiot but it made me chuckle

At the gym in the middle of a set and the guy next to me farts like 50cm away from my face. Way to kill a guys momentum
 
My gym decided that 12:40 is the best time to have the female cleaning staff clean the men's locker room. There is nothing like finishing up your workout, heading back to the lockers for a shower, and finding them closed for cleaning.

My GYM is the idiot.
 
the first time i decide to do cardio in a long ass time, i smelled vag on the bike seat.
 
Back
Top