Losing control when sparring (beginner)

1PBCE1

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I've been training MA for about 8 months now, starting with Kickboxing only but recently adding the Grappling classes my school offers.

My fitness was laughable when starting, so it's not been until recently that I've started full contact sparring.

I've sparred exactly 4 times, the first 3 times with the higher belts from my school. They let me know they hit me, but definitely held back a little while I was finding my stride.

Tonight I sparred with my mate (who is going to be best man at my wedding, to make things worse) who I started MA with, so we're roughly of the same standard technique wise (he's a lot fitter).

He got me with a great punch combo that was hard, but perfectly acceptable for full contact sparring. Having never been hit so hard to the head in such a confrontational situation, I really lost my temper and came back at him trying to hit him much harder. Well I caught him and caused a nasty graze in his nose.

I feel terrible and am wondering (hoping) this is just inexperience and I'll soon learn to control my emotions. As a note my life outside of training is pretty great right now, so it's hopefully just my reaction to getting hit that needs practice.

Thanks for some input!
 
I asked someone about this and was told that people who are both beginners/very inexperienced probably should not be sparring with each other and in a preferred situation you spar with people that have a greater deal of experience as they will know how to properly react to things just in case the newer guy loses it.

I am pretty sure it's something you begin to get over after awhile as I have noticed the longer I have been practicing the less emotions work their way into sparring sessions and such.


That's my take on it at least.
 
It's expected to happen. You just started sparring, so just give it a little more time and don't worry. The more you spar, the more you will learn to control your emotion and relax in the ring.
 
try to relax and remember they are your sparring partner, never your opponent or enemy, even when they are lighting you up and beating you around the ring. it comes with time, but if you can't control yourself in sparring you're not gonna be able to control yourself in a fight.

try going lighter and with more experienced guys until you can get your ego and anger out of the way. most guys behave the same way it's nothing to be ashamed of but the sooner you get it under control better it will be for you and the people you train with
 
I've been training MA for about 8 months now, starting with Kickboxing only but recently adding the Grappling classes my school offers.

My fitness was laughable when starting, so it's not been until recently that I've started full contact sparring.

I've sparred exactly 4 times, the first 3 times with the higher belts from my school. They let me know they hit me, but definitely held back a little while I was finding my stride.

Tonight I sparred with my mate (who is going to be best man at my wedding, to make things worse) who I started MA with, so we're roughly of the same standard technique wise (he's a lot fitter).

He got me with a great punch combo that was hard, but perfectly acceptable for full contact sparring. Having never been hit so hard to the head in such a confrontational situation, I really lost my temper and came back at him trying to hit him much harder. Well I caught him and caused a nasty graze in his nose.

I feel terrible and am wondering (hoping) this is just inexperience and I'll soon learn to control my emotions. As a note my life outside of training is pretty great right now, so it's hopefully just my reaction to getting hit that needs practice.

Thanks for some input!

It's a normal reaction to getting punched. Adrenaline, excitement, anger all get going. It should be something you grow out of as you get more experienced. (though some people never do) You'll learn to control yourself real quick when you are in against someone much better than you and you lose your temper like that.

Basically, don't be a dick. Try to stay calm and relaxed at all times when you are sparring/fighting.
 
I feel terrible and am wondering (hoping) this is just inexperience and I'll soon learn to control my emotions. As a note my life outside of training is pretty great right now, so it's hopefully just my reaction to getting hit that needs practice.

Thanks for some input!


Well, it's probably not just inexperience, but it also doesn't mean that you're a raving psycho who is bound to end up in jail.
You need to be aware of your temper though. It really sucks to do any kind of sparring (standing or on the ground) with someone who isn't in control of their own emotions.
 
Do not think of sparring as a fight or a competition, there is no winner or loser, don't worry about "beating" your opponent, even if it seems he/she is lighting you up. Instead focus on your technique and ensure everything you throw is light, this will improve your technique and will help out a lot when your sparring more experienced guys.
 
thats what happens when you get hit the face/head hard from a strike in a combat situation, you need to channel that energy into a focused and controlled attack or to create a sense of urgency to defend and evade, cant let the reaction become emotional
 
i was getting taxed yesterday in sparring by a guy i train with who is about 4 inches taller than me with better technique and power. thankfully he recognized that i wasnt ready for that level of sparring yet (which was probably pretty basic for him) and we drilled techniques instead.

it didnt make me mad because I knew that he was holding back anyways. even when i get clipped good by someone at my level, i usually smile or acknowledge it and continue. you cant/shouldnt really take it personally unless theyre being a dick and going way harder than youre comfotable with after you tell them to tone it down.

though, i did get pretty frustrated sparring this guy who had a TKD base because he was real elusive and i couldnt outkick him. i caught myself getting angry and had to mentally tell myself to calm down and just try and work some other game plan. its not a real fight...just practice to make both of you better.
 
the same thing happened ot me when I first started training muay thai 3 1/2 years ago. I was going with my brother-in-law and he is a bit taller and heavier than me, so I think I got sort of a napoleonic syndrome going and I did this huge overhand right and the coach caught me and basically shamed me. He kept calling me Hendo for a while. Fast forward to the present and now we can spar eachother in the backyard and it's always professional, if he gets a good shot on me I usually compliment him. It's better for everyone if you can maintain good control. If you want to let go every now and again that's okay too, but have enough wherewithal to be able to dial it back. Injuries suck and take away from training, plus you can't keep showing up to work with man-makeup

next time you spar make a point to do light sparring with technique and give him props if he tags you just to sort of set the mood of your guys's training together. you can both be an asset to eachother if you keep it clean

my 2 cents
 
Thats normal for some people. Some are too competitive and or lose their temper to quick and some are too relaxed and not agressive enough.

Sparring and actual fighting is all about controlled aggression.

The sooner people understand that the better they do in the ring or cage.

Where was your coach? He shouldn't have let it get to the point and should have been there to stop shit before it got out of hand.
 
Awkward moments like that just happen. You have many different personalities in the gym....when I get hit hard, I laugh. When this one guy gets hit hard at my gym, he takes it personal and everyone talks behind his back about what a bitch he is cause he lost his last fight badly. It all depends on your swag, but don't feel bad, because at the end of the day you're in the ring!:)
 
Thanks for the input guys. I've been chatting to a few of my other training partners and they all agree it's just inexperience, and if I feel unacceptably angry to just pause for a moment, take a few deep breaths and think of strategy again.
 
Someone people have a natural tendency to see red when they get tagged. Can be both good and bad. But yeah it will improve with experience. Just getting used to being beat up basically.
 
Don't worry man sparring is rough and you just gotta work through the growing pains. Kickboxing is a rough ass sport man. So people are gonna come at u hard and you gotta pop them back and some people are just gonna work with you.
 
Be careful. If you lose your temper and start going balls out you might walk into something.
 
Been training MMA for 5 months and haven't sparred yet but I could see myself losing my cool like that too.
 
i can relate.. but I'm speaking upon myself about my own experiences, and I can probably see that I am also unexperienced during sparring. I do get a bit tense, and angry inside but I do not show it and still try to keep my composure. But sometimes when you get tagged alot you want to retaliate and hit the guy back equally as hard. I guess from what everyones been saying it just true. You need to just practice/spar more to build up experience and self control.
 
I'm having issues as well I remain relaxed and calm while sparring the I was sparring with yesterday hit me with a hard knee so I returned the favour by giving him a right hook it pissed him off I tried to negotiate with him but he was even more toxic and started making threats a lot of the guys in the gym told me he was nuts I believe them now I'm avoidIng him I started 4 months ago in that Muay Thai class and he's been there for 5 years he should at least be used to hard hits.
 
I'm having issues as well I remain relaxed and calm while sparring the I was sparring with yesterday hit me with a hard knee so I returned the favour by giving him a right hook it pissed him off I tried to negotiate with him but he was even more toxic and started making threats a lot of the guys in the gym told me he was nuts I believe them now I'm avoidIng him I started 4 months ago in that Muay Thai class and he's been there for 5 years he should at least be used to hard hits.
This thread is from 2012.
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