Mgtow thread

[sub_thug]

Why do you think we need women in our lives, in order to "start going after the things that actually matter." Is it not possible to do those things with out a woman?

See above post.

 

[Kframe]

You have never enjoyed the camaraderie and companionship of a woman? She's always just been a fuck doll to you? If so, it sounds like you were broken long before the MGTOW stuff started.

If you need a therapist, it's not like I'm standing between you and a clinic, blocking the doorway. But I am telling you from firsthand experience that the best thing to do is not waste another second crying about spilled milk. Go restart your life, man. And for those that weren't "shredded," because I don't believe that these guys 100% have legitimate gripes, then they need to stop being crybabies.

I want you to think of a small child for a second. That child falls. If you run up to the child, asking it what is wrong, the child will start crying. If you walk up, tell the child that they are alright, smile, and send them off back to play, they don't cry. And yet the fall is the same.

They aren't at home because they want to be there. They are at home because they've sworn off a part of their lives. It's the choice to not do what they want to be doing because they are too afraid to do it. So they are filling their time with other things as a means of covering that dead space. Like I was saying, if they were out there pursuing their dreams from the start, forgoing a family because they wanted something else more, that's a legitimate choice. But this pack of wounded souls isn't doing that. They are running from their problems, and that's not a good example for others to be following.

A fuck doll? No. She was more then that. She was my, while we were dating, my best friend. The sad thing is, the moment I put a ring on and said vows, she dropped her fake mask and the woman I dated ceased to exist. Sadly I I have spent the best part of 11 years trying to repair and salvage our marriage, to find that woman I dated. Yet I know I was deceived, for now I know she never existed. So no, she was never a fuck doll. She was something more, some thing great, but sadly she was fake. I know what you are going to say, just divorce her, well 11 years and 2 kids later, that would cost me the home I worked so hard to buy. Working on a plan to increase my income so I can divorce her, but it will take some time. Gotta embrace the suck for just a while longer..

Some of us were terribly hurt. But when that moment comes, and I am free, you think I should just go find another "soul mate" If TRP has taught me anything is that Oneitis is bad, no pussy belongs on a pedestal. Why in hell should I risk another LTR with a woman, who will be wearing a fake mask, and risk again loosing more of my things and money in the process? How in fucks name is that in any form a benefit to me? I dislike the notion of running on a treadmill, getting no where, improving my lot in life, only to watch it burn, which is exactly what will happen if you jump back in to LTR with them. Right now, I see no benefit. Prove to me there is benefit. Prove to me there are actual women out there who are not fake and worthy of my effort.

Why have you given up so much power to females? So much that you cant live your life with out them. In you the feminists have truly won.

 

[Kframe]

They aren't at home because they want to be there. They are at home because they've sworn off a part of their lives. It's the choice to not do what they want to be doing because they are too afraid to do it. So they are filling their time with other things as a means of covering that dead space. Like I was saying, if they were out there pursuing their dreams from the start, forgoing a family because they wanted something else more, that's a legitimate choice. But this pack of wounded souls isn't doing that. They are running from their problems, and that's not a good example for others to be following.

So you think that just because someone is mgtow they are at home? So you think that MGTOW are just not doing anything? Are they not doing some hobby or past time, or a job? Why must it be at home in your words, why can't it be that they are on a hike, or at the gym or the movies? Joining mgtow prevents one from doing those things?
You think that women should just be the centerpiece of their life? That they can not in anyway do things they enjoy with out one?

 

[Robocok]

I'm not telling you to get married and have kids. I've never said that you need to do that. What I am saying is that swearing off women because you've been burned once before is a coward's response to a universal human experience. We've all burned someone, and we've all been burned. If you let someone else change the course of your life like that, you're a chicken shit who can't deal with the problems of the real world.

Heard all the red pill stuff before. Still not central to my argument. I'm not here to defend the court system and how it does its business.

What I am shaming is any man who lets someone else alter the course of his life because he's too much of a sensitive snowflake to take a punch to the gut and keep coming forward. Life moves on, and if you stay curled up like a little ball, you're wasting the best parts of it. This is what frustrates me about this movement. It's not that guys just aren't interested in a relationship or women, it's that they are too scared to enter the pool because they've been burned once before and are too jaded. If this were a conversation about a bunch of guys who legitimately were pursuing their dreams and letting a family take the back burner, this would be a different conversation. But it's simply not.

I think you're lumping me in with a segment with which I don't personally identify with. Even though I haven't sworn off women completely, I don't see anything wrong with that. If a guy has been burned and decides to focus on himself, what's wrong with that? If one is genuinely happier living his life as what you describe as chicken shit, should he compromise his own happiness to please you?

I'm more of the swearing off marriage and having more kids ilk. I've been burned once on both fronts and won't be shamed into that bullshit again. That said, I am enjoying single life for now. I don't think it will last forever but it doesn't really matter how anyone else would view it if it did. I'm going to do my thing and enjoy myself.

 

[sub_thug]

A fuck doll? No. She was more then that. She was my, while we were dating, my best friend. The sad thing is, the moment I put a ring on and said vows, she dropped her fake mask and the woman I dated ceased to exist. Sadly I I have spent the best part of 11 years trying to repair and salvage our marriage, to find that woman I dated. Yet I know I was deceived, for now I know she never existed. So no, she was never a fuck doll. She was something more, some thing great, but sadly she was fake. I know what you are going to say, just divorce her, well 11 years and 2 kids later, that would cost me the home I worked so hard to buy. Working on a plan to increase my income so I can divorce her, but it will take some time. Gotta embrace the suck for just a while longer..

Some of us were terribly hurt. But when that moment comes, and I am free, you think I should just go find another "soul mate" If TRP has taught me anything is that Oneitis is bad, no pussy belongs on a pedestal. Why in hell should I risk another LTR with a woman, who will be wearing a fake mask, and risk again loosing more of my things and money in the process? How in fucks name is that in any form a benefit to me? I dislike the notion of running on a treadmill, getting no where, improving my lot in life, only to watch it burn, which is exactly what will happen if you jump back in to LTR with them. Right now, I see no benefit. Prove to me there is benefit. Prove to me there are actual women out there who are not fake and worthy of my effort.

Why have you given up so much power to females? So much that you cant live your life with out them. In you the feminists have truly won.

If that's all true, then I'm sorry to hear that you're going through that. I get sucking it up for now so that you can have a better future. It's a bad hand, man. But once this is all over, I hope that you can move past this and find some happiness out there. It's a tough prospect, but I hope that you can find someone out there who appreciates you for you, someone who can be honest with you about who they really are.

When I got divorced, I was pretty miserable. I was getting ready to go back out again for another deployment, so I worked the legal stuff as best as I could from around the world, and when I got back, there was definitely a part of me that wanted to just curl up into a ball. But you know what? I said to myself that I had already wasted too much time with my ex, and I forced myself to get back out there. It was really hard at first, doing a dance that I hadn't done in a while. Before you knew it, I was back on my game, and about 6 months later, I went on a date with the woman I am married to now. She's awesome, so much better in every way than my ex was. And while it was hard to get back out there, the rewards were great.

I haven't given up power. I've just enriched every area of my life. I haven't neglected any one part. I am professionally satisfied, able to pursue hobbies and interests, my family (the one I was born into and the one I chose for myself) is awesome, and I have enough financial freedom to where I am looking to buy a home while saving up for retirement.

 

[sub_thug]

So you think that just because someone is mgtow they are at home? So you think that MGTOW are just not doing anything? Are they not doing some hobby or past time, or a job? Why must it be at home in your words, why can't it be that they are on a hike, or at the gym or the movies? Joining mgtow prevents one from doing those things?
You think that women should just be the centerpiece of their life? That they can not in anyway do things they enjoy with out one?

See my other post. This is just trying to put words into my mouth that I never said.

 

[sub_thug]

I think you're lumping me in with a segment with which I don't personally identify with. Even though I haven't sworn off women completely, I don't see anything wrong with that. If a guy has been burned and decides to focus on himself, what's wrong with that? If one is genuinely happier living his life as what you describe as chicken shit, should he compromise his own happiness to please you?

I'm more of the swearing off marriage and having more kids ilk. I've been burned once on both fronts and won't be shamed into that bullshit again. That said, I am enjoying single life for now. I don't think it will last forever but it doesn't really matter how anyone else would view it if it did. I'm going to do my thing and enjoy myself.

Most seem to be the burned, bitter type.

What I keep arguing for is not to ignore any area of your life. Staying busy and covering up a gap with business doesn't help.

Ok, then don't get remarried or have more kids. Too easy, man.

 

[Jimmy Jazz]

I'm 29 almost 30 I just don't have the warm fuzzy feelings for girls I had when I was 15-18. Its just not there anymore. Things arent the same.It would be nice to feel that way again someday but I don't see it happening. oh well

 

[FierceRedBelt]

I'm 29 almost 30 I just don't have the warm fuzzy feelings for girls I had when I was 15-18. Its just not there anymore. Things arent the same.It would be nice to feel that way again someday but I don't see it happening. oh well

I went a decade without feeling intense attraction. First week of starting a new job I ran into a young lady and my stomach dropped, I couldn't breathe, I couldn't keep eye contact and I couldn't think straight; I'd say it was like being 15 again but I've never been this strongly attracted, ever.

I assure it you it can happen at your age.

 

[Robocok]

This used to be called just not being a beta male. It never required a support group or the anti women slant these guys want to give it.

I disagree with this label because I believe you can be alpha and mgtow. The common conception is that one would only ever choose to not seek female validation if they weren't really capable of achieving it or that they're too scared of rejection, in other words, beta.

I think alphas can and do easily fall prey to the pitfalls of love and relationships in the modern western world. Females are hypergamous and have extremely high expectations. You can take care of business in your love life in many ways and still fall victim to this.

I don't know that I'd call mgtow a support group, but I wouldn't shy away from the label. It's a group of dudes that have had first hand experience with the worst aspects of female nature and gynocentrism who want a break from the game. There's nothing wrong with it and it's nothing to be ashamed of.

Are you going to find examples within the mgtow movement that embody all of the worst traits you mentioned who irrationally hate all women and are cowardly? Sure, but that's like pointing to the just bleed guy and saying that all fans of martial arts are blood thirsty morons. Every one has their own interpretation of mgtow and it's not accurate to label them all as sexist losers with no other option. Personally, I just want to focus on me right now and I can date later if and when I choose on my terms.

 

[blaseblah]

I disagree with this label because I believe you can be alpha and mgtow. The common conception is that one would only ever choose to not seek female validation if they weren't really capable of achieving it or that they're too scared of rejection, in other words, beta.

I think alphas can and do easily fall prey to the pitfalls of love and relationships in the modern western world. Females are hypergamous and have extremely high expectations. You can take care of business in your love life in many ways and still fall victim to this.

I don't know that I'd call mgtow a support group, but I wouldn't shy away from the label. It's a group of dudes that have had first hand experience with the worst aspects of female nature and gynocentrism who want a break from the game. There's nothing wrong with it and it's nothing to be ashamed of.

Are you going to find examples within the mgtow movement that embody all of the worst traits you mentioned who irrationally hate all women and are cowardly? Sure, but that's like pointing to the just bleed guy and saying that all fans of martial arts are blood thirsty morons. Every one has their own interpretation of mgtow and it's not accurate to label them all as sexist losers with no other option. Personally, I just want to focus on me right now and I can date later if and when I choose on my terms.

You're choosing to form a support group with the specific purpose of avoiding women. You're defining yourself by the female gender.

Also if you need to avoid women to "focus on yourself" then that means you arent focusing on yourself while in a relationship. You're being subservient, aka a beta.

You know what I do when I'm in a relationship? The exact same things I do when I'm single. Work out, go out to bars, hang out with my friends, go hiking, camping, traveling etc. A female has never came between me and my interests. And if you can't figure out how to do this you are approaching relationships the wrong way. They are supposed to be enhancements to an already awesome life, not the building block to a crappy one.

And when I'm not dating? I just call that being single. No need to form a support group, no need to rant to other bitter losers about how women have been holding me down.

 

[FierceRedBelt]

I disagree with this label because I believe you can be alpha and mgtow. The common conception is that one would only ever choose to not seek female validation if they weren't really capable of achieving it or that they're too scared of rejection, in other words, beta.

I think alphas can and do easily fall prey to the pitfalls of love and relationships in the modern western world. Females are hypergamous and have extremely high expectations. You can take care of business in your love life in many ways and still fall victim to this.

I don't know that I'd call mgtow a support group, but I wouldn't shy away from the label. It's a group of dudes that have had first hand experience with the worst aspects of female nature and gynocentrism who want a break from the game. There's nothing wrong with it and it's nothing to be ashamed of.

Are you going to find examples within the mgtow movement that embody all of the worst traits you mentioned who irrationally hate all women and are cowardly? Sure, but that's like pointing to the just bleed guy and saying that all fans of martial arts are blood thirsty morons. Every one has their own interpretation of mgtow and it's not accurate to label them all as sexist losers with no other option. Personally, I just want to focus on me right now and I can date later if and when I choose on my terms.

I strongly think you'll find that the alpha wolf model doesn't translate to wolf packs and is miles off of primate behavior.

MGTOW promotes a "making yourself the prize" approach to life. Self improvement and focusing on doing something more significant that catering to a woman's whims are the very foundation. Thus, I'd venture to say that MGTOW is a hyper vigilant version of what pop culture refers to as the alpha male outside of violent behavior.

 

[FierceRedBelt]

@Robocok I'll have to go back and read but trying to salvage your marriage every couple of months is worth the effort.

There's something to say for being hand tied to someone for better or worse. You're getting the worst of her and you can't abandon it, how you handle the situation could really lead to the most significant growth based relationship you'll ever have.

 

[Renard]

Here's my take on the mgtow thing from an attachment theory and cognitive perspective:

-> As the child the man receives poor parenting, perhaps especially from his mother.
-> As a result, he develops an insecure attachment style, most likely preoccupied or fearful-avoidant, which is a negative mental object representation of others as unable to meet his needs. But perhaps especially he develops a negative representation of women (based on the mother).
-> As an adult, he searches for partners which verify his pre-existing beliefs about himself (self-verification) and repeats the early traumatic pattern.
-> This translates into picking a woman who can't give him the love he needs e.g. a woman with a dismissing attachment, a toxic woman.
-> He acts in a meek and subservient fashion during the relationship, gives up his needs to accommodate his partner, as is typical for an anxiously attached person. He becomes unhappy.
-> Predictably, the relationship explodes. Every negative experience strengthens his schema of "women are bad, women are evil, women are unfair," etc. Every individual has a different version of the schema.
-> It eventually culminates into a schema coping mode called surrender. The man surrenders himself to the schema, despite it being very painful, and accepts it as true instead of fighting it "Women are bad, I can't do anything about it. All I do is stay alone and accept my fate."

Every person will be mgtow for a different "reason" (reason that is consciously known), but I bet you that this general path is very common

 

[Jumpy]

MGTOW.. in theory it sounds cool, but in practice it's a bunch of whiney little turds bitching and moaning on forums about how they can't attract the romantic interest of the fairer sex. r/incels may be an extreme MGTOW board, but it's a cesspit that needs to be wiped out.

 

[Organic Damage]

I always thought it was a toxic bitter circle jerk full of jaded men. Mind you im someone who prefers to be single and cant really see myself settling down with marriage

but i still wouldnt touch that movement with a ten foot poll.

Someting about a bunch of dudes who would rather hang out with each other than women not sitting right with you, bro?

 

[Organic Damage]

I am more or less MGTOW for the following reasons:

1. Females of my generation ( my teen years were 2000-2005) were in to scum bags and wannabe gangsters. The impression I was left with was that, women of my generation have shitty taste and critical thinking skills.

2. Feminism, I am sick of it, you don't hear them bitching when they get the higher end of the stick on various advantages in life such as not getting drafted in war or not having or being expected to do shitty jobs.

3. Unfair dating expectation, when you say you don't like fat girls, people treat you like your the worse person in the world. But if a chick says she doesn't like short guys then its ok, there is nothing wrong with that, its considered a matter of taste.

4. Mentally weak, how many men do you know who are part of fat acceptance? Meanwhile women want to give up and throw in the towel while blaming their genetics or pretend to be beautiful and healthy.


5. Delusional thinking, many women who lack a sense of humor, looks and a physique or a proper job expect a man who has it all. Like why would a man of that caliber waste time with these type of women? At least be super hot....


6. Lastly and the most important point, the dating/marriage game is a rigged game that is designed for the female to prosper while the man suffers. I talked to a female divorce lawyer and it is a goddamn racket. The marriage laws were there to protect the house wives of 1940s who were nannies and home makers of their generation. They sacrificed an education to take care of their husband and the kids.

This means that the alimony was a FAIR protection system to defend the old school house wife from a parasitic opportunist of husband who were looking to ditch their wives. But we live in a different world, women work and hook up same as men. They are no longer the women of 1940s who are sacrificing their time and education to be a devoted wife. Therefore they are not entitled to anything.

You seem to make reasonable points but I feel like the general reaction to what you're saying by wider society is still that you play the game no matter how rigged it may seem or how dubious the spoils. It's just "the way it is"

Not sure how much I've ever agreed with blind acceptance of the status quo, however.

 

[God_Emperor_Of_Mankind]

Well if you see the number of people making 'dog parks are great for meeting women' and 'is the gym a good place to meet women' threads you'll notice the pursuit of women can be an unhealthy obsession too.

everything in moderation.

 

[Organic Damage]

Well if you see the number of people making 'dog parks are great for meeting women' and 'is the gym a good place to meet women' threads you'll notice the pursuit of women can be an unhealthy obsession too.

everything in moderation.

I don't think going after what you want (a companion and a family) is necessarily something you can strive too much for.

But I do question about people who don't feel like whole self-contained humans without having attained those things.

 

[DaDamn]

Happiness and freedom seem to go hand and hand for me. I’m 3 years removed from a toxic marriage and I’m the happiest I’ve ever been. I do what I want when I want. I’m done dealing with other people’s emotions or timelines. I score strange here and there and that’s enough for me. Hell, I just had an ex pay for a 5 day cruise to Jamaica and the Grand Cayman islands. If I was in a relationship I could have never taking that trip. To me MGTOW seems to be more about keeping your options open and avoiding being sucked in by some soul sucking needy jealous cunt. Of course, if the RIGHT girl would happen to come along, like I said, my options are open.