Premier League Thread 2017/18 v32: Bunch Of Lazy Kernts In Dis Fred Edition.

[Chules]

hello

@almighty ang

 

[Dr J]

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1300853/

 

[Chules]

@Sexy

I saw a poster for your bae that I shat on and I remembered you

 

[Clear Winner]

I did one of these for the OT and @Dr J asked me to make one for the Prem thread, so here it is.





@Tules, a former captain of the England national football team, who was banned from football for life for fixing a match between England and Germany (the England Football Team's greatest European rivals),and captained by @Deffid, is sentenced to three years in Longmarsh prison for assaulting two police officers after a long drinking session and driving recklessly to a local bar.

Once inside, he is immediately beaten up by the prison guards (played by @Rawex and LilMountain) for misbehaving, and is subsequently approached by the prison governor (played by @xtramob). The governor offers Tules a job as coach of the prison wardens' football team; not wanting to make enemies with the other prisoners, Tules declines, and instead offers to train a team consisting of other inmates, who will take on the wardens in a practice match. Tules then recruits the resident contraband dealer, @ Dr J, as his right-hand man, and receives advice from an elderly convict, @blokeybloke, who teaches Tules prison lore and warns Tules to avoid making mistakes by revealing he was in prison for killing an enemy as well as the enemy's wife and child with a grenade.

Tules wins the respect of the other inmates after he attacks an officer, Mr. @Concrete, who is severely beating Dr J, and is then occupied with the task of training up his team of cons, including a maximum-security con named @UltimateVictory. Meanwhile, the governor of the prison gets himself into trouble with " @Carl Drogo the bookie," an unlicensed bookie who was recommended to him by @Nowhere Fast, the resident prison boss, and decides to try to make back the money he owes by betting on the prison guards' team. Blokey is killed when @frenzy, an unstable inmate and bomb expert, plants a bomb in Tule's locker at the encouragement of Mr. Concrete. Frenzy is subsequently sent to another facility, but not to the minimum-security hospital he was promised – he is sent to an alternate facility where Concrete reveals he will be heavily sedated all the time.

The match commences shortly after Blokey's death. At half time, the inmates' team, is winning 1–0, and things are going well until the governor, fearing what will happen if he loses a second bet, attempts to blackmail Tules into throwing the match. At first he puts his own interests before that of the team's, deliberately playing badly but as the final moments of the game tick down, he redeems himself, bravely using a square-ball to fellow inmate @Good Ole Stannis's BBQ to win the game for the cons. Afterward, the Captain of the Guards, Mr. @EOW, refuses to co-operate with the governor's attempts to get revenge on Tules instead congratulating him on the match. The governor's vehicle explodes, and Nowhere Fast informs him that he, and Drogo the Bookie, will retaliate if he tries anything. Tules and Dr J walk triumphantly across the pitch.

No Cee Dubbs, sounds shit.

 

[frenz]

this might push me to the edge.

 

[Chules]

this might push me to the edge.

remembered this song randomly lol

 

[frenz]

remembered this song randomly lol

tune

 

[UVee]

I did one of these for the OT and @Dr J asked me to make one for the Prem thread, so here it is.





@Tules, a former captain of the England national football team, who was banned from football for life for fixing a match between England and Germany (the England Football Team's greatest European rivals),and captained by @Deffid, is sentenced to three years in Longmarsh prison for assaulting two police officers after a long drinking session and driving recklessly to a local bar.

Once inside, he is immediately beaten up by the prison guards (played by @Rawex and LilMountain) for misbehaving, and is subsequently approached by the prison governor (played by @xtramob). The governor offers Tules a job as coach of the prison wardens' football team; not wanting to make enemies with the other prisoners, Tules declines, and instead offers to train a team consisting of other inmates, who will take on the wardens in a practice match. Tules then recruits the resident contraband dealer, @ Dr J, as his right-hand man, and receives advice from an elderly convict, @blokeybloke, who teaches Tules prison lore and warns Tules to avoid making mistakes by revealing he was in prison for killing an enemy as well as the enemy's wife and child with a grenade.

Tules wins the respect of the other inmates after he attacks an officer, Mr. @Concrete, who is severely beating Dr J, and is then occupied with the task of training up his team of cons, including a maximum-security con named @UltimateVictory. Meanwhile, the governor of the prison gets himself into trouble with " @Carl Drogo the bookie," an unlicensed bookie who was recommended to him by @Nowhere Fast, the resident prison boss, and decides to try to make back the money he owes by betting on the prison guards' team. Blokey is killed when @frenzy, an unstable inmate and bomb expert, plants a bomb in Tule's locker at the encouragement of Mr. Concrete. Frenzy is subsequently sent to another facility, but not to the minimum-security hospital he was promised – he is sent to an alternate facility where Concrete reveals he will be heavily sedated all the time.

The match commences shortly after Blokey's death. At half time, the inmates' team, is winning 1–0, and things are going well until the governor, fearing what will happen if he loses a second bet, attempts to blackmail Tules into throwing the match. At first he puts his own interests before that of the team's, deliberately playing badly but as the final moments of the game tick down, he redeems himself, bravely using a square-ball to fellow inmate @Good Ole Stannis's BBQ to win the game for the cons. Afterward, the Captain of the Guards, Mr. @EOW, refuses to co-operate with the governor's attempts to get revenge on Tules instead congratulating him on the match. The governor's vehicle explodes, and Nowhere Fast informs him that he, and Drogo the Bookie, will retaliate if he tries anything. Tules and Dr J walk triumphantly across the pitch.

The unstable inmate is spot on especially after the confrontation last night.

 

[frenz]

lmao. the neighbour complained to my landlady that shes not comfortable with me knocking on her door. well im not comfortable with you being a cunt and having music on 24/7. told my landlady and she was like fuck her, i'll sort her out for having it on all the time. winning

 

[Clear Winner]

@Rawex @Tules @Tobago Jones

Watch Ngannou's nonchalant bodying of the machine at the end.



If Reem gets touched, he dead.

 

[Chules]

The unstable inmate is spot on especially after the confrontation last night.

are you a gangsta of love?

 

[Almighty Angus]

lmao. the neighbour complained to my landlady that shes not comfortable with me knocking on her door. well im not comfortable with you being a cunt and having music on 24/7. told my landlady and she was like fuck her, i'll sort her out for having it on all the time. winning

lol, if you were in America, I would have opened the door and told you to fuck off. Then when you started ranting and threatening me, like you would, I'd shoot you right in the fucking face and say that felt my life was threatened.

WINNING.

 

[Sebbe]

Bruce Arena has resigned. They should have given him two more years.
Amirite @Tules

 

[Chules]

@frenzy

I'd be on stage 3 of liver disease within the hour

 

[frenz]

@frenzy

I'd be on stage 3 of liver disease within the hour

issa dead me

 

[Tobago Jones]

@Rawex @Tules @Tobago Jones

Watch Ngannou's nonchalant bodying of the machine at the end.



If Reem gets touched, he dead.

Reem's chin gets cracked. Seriously hope Ngannou wins, HW division is shocking right now and has been for some time.

 

[Chules]

lol, if you were in America, I would have opened the door and told you to fuck off. Then when you started ranting and threatening me, like you would, I'd shoot you right in the fucking face and say that felt my life was threatened.

WINNING.

I'd be shook to even knock on somebody's door at night in the US lol

 

[Almighty Angus]

I'd be shook to even knock on somebody's door at night in the US lol

Unless you're delivering food or you are the police, probably best to stay the fuck out of people's yards.

 

[Clear Winner]

lol, if you were in America, I would have opened the door and told you to fuck off. Then when you started ranting and threatening me, like you would, I'd shoot you right in the fucking face and say that felt my life was threatened.

WINNING.

MURICAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!

 

[Clear Winner]

Reem's chin gets cracked. Seriously hope Ngannou wins, HW division is shocking right now and has been for some time.

I actually think it's the strongest it's ever been over the last 4 years, but nobody's chin can last long enough to be great. Even when Pride had the golden era of HWs, they only had 3 or 4 well rounded fighters.