Someone tried to rob me at gunpoint today.

You're a dead man walking, just a matter of time. He will come for you when you least expect it. You shouldn't have done that.

Done what? Its not like organized crime is in the business of robbing small business.
 
Never bring a knife to a gun fight.
Well... i just watched a vid from the slo mo guys, and they were able to split a bullet in pieces with an axe.

Granted, it would take an incredible amount of training to be able to skillfully do that, but it's possible.

So, get on that TS.
 
But, you live in 1st world Mexico. Lies I say.
 
20180312_141904.jpg
Lol you bought that? Where? The garbage store?
 
So for the first time in my life I was a victim of a violent crime, some fucking asshole pulled a gun on me but clearly was too much of a pussy to pull the trigger.

I was stupidly pissed off at the beginning of the day because a worker was running late and I'm having a delivery truck on the shop so work is piling up and this fucking asshole pretends to buy something and pulls a gun on me.

So me being super pissed I didn't had time to react smartly and threw the desk at him and ducked under it while shouting profanities, the guy was scared I suppose because he left and I followed him (i was seeing red) he gets on a bike and points the gun at me and tells me he is going to kill me later and seeing the gun i duck again behind some cement bags.

Now i dont know if the gun was fake or an airsoft gun since i dont know much about them, but he cocked it, so i dont really want to take any chance and im sure as hell looking both sides when leaving today.

I heard that there has been several business hit by a guy with the same description and i hope they get him but i live in Mexico where crime pays, so right now i just bought me a machete but if i stop posting is because the pinche puto maricon came back to finish the job.
Was the word "puto" used in your profanity laced reaction?

Glad you're ok, dude.
 
At that point I was seeing red, and yes I need a vacation.
I hear Mexico is nice.

I work with 5 guys from Mexico, they come here on work permits, they are such nice guys and hard workers, i consider them my friends first and my co-workers second. They also say that back in Mexico there are a lot of dangerous people and a lot of shady shit.

I'm glad it worked out for you, i was in a similar situation over 13 years ago, i was also lucky.
 
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Similar thing happened to me today...

I went to the local coffee shop, was flirting with the beautiful japanese cashier for a bit before I totally banged her in the back. Right when I was done dropping that load on lady hiroshima there was this commotion out front. Suddenly this guy busts in with two AR-15's and a strap of grenades, I quickly pulled up my Michael Kors pants I got on sale at Target, and went running out.

"I'm guessing you didn't bring those just to measure dicks, did you hombre?" I said to the guy.

"You shut your mou-" before he could finish I hit him in the mouth with a jumping side kick, at the same time pivoting off his face and grabbing both AR-15's from him and tossing them upward as I twist-flipped back into position. The AR-15's landed in my hands as he began to gather himself. As he came to realize what had happened, I took the time his amazement had granted me to say,

"Hey fuck stick, would you say this blew up in your face or what?"

Then I immediately crane-kicked him in the chest about 14 feet back, through the door, and as he was safely falling into the street I shot him about 32 times in the chest, exploding the grenades and sending a smoky mist of humanity all over the streets.

I finally became flaccid, the japanese cashier I banged ran up and knelt down by my leg in adoration of my achievement in masculinity and alphatocity. I propped both AR's upwards as an eagle soared low behind me, looked down at the cashier and said...

"Looks like you're gonna need to cock my gun again, pussy cheeks."

...as I instantly became erect again with such velocity that it tore a 6 inch by 6 inch hole right through my black Michael Kors pants that I got on sale at Target,

Then like 20 mins later I went to work and realized I totally forgot my wallet at home. Such a crazy day.
 
Similar thing happened to me today...

I went to the local coffee shop, was flirting with the beautiful japanese cashier for a bit before I totally banged her in the back. Right when I was done dropping that load on lady hiroshima there was this commotion out front. Suddenly this guy busts in with two AR-15's and a strap of grenades, I quickly pulled up my Michael Kors pants I got on sale at Target, and went running out.

"I'm guessing you didn't bring those just to measure dicks, did you hombre?" I said to the guy.

"You shut your mou-" before he could finish I hit him in the mouth with a jumping side kick, at the same time pivoting off his face and grabbing both AR-15's from him and tossing them upward as I twist-flipped back into position. The AR-15's landed in my hands as he began to gather himself. As he came to realize what had happened, I took the time his amazement had granted me to say,

"Hey fuck stick, would you say this blew up in your face or what?"

Then I immediately crane-kicked him in the chest about 14 feet back, through the door, and as he was safely falling into the street I shot him about 32 times in the chest, exploding the grenades and sending a smoky mist of humanity all over the streets.

I finally became flaccid, the japanese cashier I banged ran up and knelt down by my leg in adoration of my achievement in masculinity and alphatocity. I propped both AR's upwards as an eagle soared low behind me, looked down at the cashier and said...

"Looks like you're gonna need to cock my gun again, pussy cheeks."

...as I instantly became erect again with such velocity that it tore a 6 inch by 6 inch hole right through my black Michael Kors pants that I got on sale at Target,

Then like 20 mins later I went to work and realized I totally forgot my wallet at home. Such a crazy day.

-3.75 out of 10. Wouldn't read (the first paragraph that I did read) again.
 
Damn, thats crazy. Lucky you are unharmed. I hope the police catch him.
 
-3.75 out of 10. Wouldn't read (the first paragraph that I did read) again.

You think my life gives a fuck about math? 3.dicks out of your asshole, I'm never sharing my morning with you again. There was gonna be a sequel where I revealed what kind of coffee I got and then a prequel part where I explained why I came to pick out the pair of black Michael Kors pants that I ended up buying, on sale. But now I'm not going to because you said words.

What's your telephone number by the way?
 
Oh and I'm glad you're alright Rod1. But next time: step-in side elbow/disarm+retrieve combo followed by a quick 270 degree spin to a lower stance and 2 shots to the abdomen. Works every time.
 
I hope you kill him or he doesn't bribe the right cop..

I dont know if its because its election year or because these cops are indeed trying to do their work but i got into a patrol car and we combed the area hoping to catch the guy, but i guess he hid in a house or the cops miscalculated the possible route.
 
Is mace/pepper spray legal in Mexico?

Yeah, its legal, so are tazers and a lot of things like that.

Mexican gun laws are specifically made to prevent armed uprisings and are ancient, so they ban pretty much all weapons that can fire "military grade" munitions.
 
So for the first time in my life I was a victim of a violent crime, some fucking asshole pulled a gun on me but clearly was too much of a pussy to pull the trigger.

I was stupidly pissed off at the beginning of the day because a worker was running late and I'm having a delivery truck on the shop so work is piling up and this fucking asshole pretends to buy something and pulls a gun on me.

So me being super pissed I didn't had time to react smartly and threw the desk at him and ducked under it while shouting profanities, the guy was scared I suppose because he left and I followed him (i was seeing red) he gets on a bike and points the gun at me and tells me he is going to kill me later and seeing the gun i duck again behind some cement bags.

Now i dont know if the gun was fake or an airsoft gun since i dont know much about them, but he cocked it, so i dont really want to take any chance and im sure as hell looking both sides when leaving today.

I heard that there has been several business hit by a guy with the same description and i hope they get him but i live in Mexico where crime pays, so right now i just bought me a machete but if i stop posting is because the pinche puto maricon came back to finish the job.

Glad you are alive
Pinche puto Maricon is my Spanish lesson of the day
 
Got mace

fJZDmSYJ_QNwnawO0X8Mj-43fJrYoryQS9u93kH2p47AlABXbS8Hl2oB2gYCrB84mauzmmKslcTaMLUUjcATFtZ1FaEcvq5lFglH3nca7eNHrbzlmD4DOA9LBE1qZUNlhEMAy6WW8y3wgk_Zv_F10oHgFtelCvjwV15t3a5p5aNYSMy1AH5c7cHvNEDjjFk18UPCbj0L1cLZBxdiYbWdV4DC4nVBCpn4IGBfnFD-IRD46jzf0uqSAr1E8svh_XllW4B3qFwueOYVT1KJTgAyWBWZgRBV49XsKkrrGajUOHZORVQ6vezTyxFA3ceTt3Jd9ZAF-gV5ZKccCUmRBdkbq7kxZfXgzlx8D3nuDOFj2vCK54YH8uVelJbimn8Wj_LYPsZI8-i2-F-G_1IeGSOtnCkLbSgQLYE_BIu6kPD7cMbdK9vnhzA7GbVkTjWaBGtGOMDPxGRbamAaw9_fY1HWN8n3FgfEUHmMULZDL458PWj9u2BUSECKBS896VMfK7Ep5yPCNC0Z8-ghy0duoS_JhovnNhaSUYP61EvH7fjb3BiHt7sNRu1KrTzd3cHBQEM0P-EU1Q-HvO0NnY8ckhf458g-hAZqwFcXQkbaDn_YSj-Zdv5rjS7-Hi4lWc9nkASBOieI5KRNygTehysNUEjwICdLTq4lxus8=w398-h662-no


And i found a nice place under the desk to store the machete. I seriously wish i had a gun.

MY1QG3dByKj9b1QX49_xlBZ_SD4rxakadDfwSXuY1dHEBmlg8uvoEh-FMq1ftSvDF-QNMzumr2k3WRfcv5jhBqzSA08RjkQT-XXFwqa7falB4YUogNvuVi0MgGU-tBW7nyoOR5BoAGDYpsFWfhw0NUwJ37sQYKtSxrwSQwC2fUjDn41yt9XDlLaNMFTbqS31Ela2E7u83JxjFrHaLpRUBgx82TjXJZ8vT-16BHrd8u7a1iFvCfQGJPI34OdhfqvdPzqchkqTuWtEGx-8aJ17vPu6hJboVb_N4X_1KBKGahIFKsnopyoVaTZ-AeghLxJM3hQfZ3S7lhd1y3TrxBseFpS-CE5Aw8CAtNgwO1ykgb9at7mJmU89QLcrtropsPpWcNMbx9oKmCNkkkcq-_4rmNQKIFW1qVE0b96o1JgzYTTeC0DaDCE3Z0qAVR1fIj8dFk-FLOOUq_AZNRTUeOvySt7nwO2uo9CprRLe34PzuFMh83EViL3Y6nDLeHGDCQIIJGyjbk_U5A6QeuS5SkG2MVNjgDRmwQRrJPq-I_S7blGEDvlBuMURLpSx6ECBiHlX8QBUbr5-2va6mvk5RQ-pJtCuCJZBET1N7buGtGs=w883-h662-no
 

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