Would you be cool with your wife/gf hanging out with a guy friend?

MikeMcMann said:
Once again I will just point out you are liar as I have never said or suggested any such thing and you certainly can't quote me saying that.

Can a friendship lead to emotional intimacy? Yes it can. Does every friendship lead to it? No it does not.

Going to work is the prime thing leading to affairs (or one of them) so again what are you going to do about that?
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You can still build emotional closeness at work if you allow it to happen. You keep saying that putting time and effort into the relationship will prevent it when that is a bold faced out and out lie yet you keep parroting it. Proven by every forum cheaters talk in. FUCK one dude in this thread already said that the married women he fucked were well loved and not underserved, yet they still cheated..
 
SL1200 said:
There's a dutch saying "zoals de waard is vertrouwt hij zijn gasten"

You expect others to act like you act yourself.. if you don't trust her it's because you know you are untrustworthy yourself
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I've always liked this phrase and think it is true in most cases. Of course one could be loyal and still not trust other people. I lock my doors not because I would steal from someone, but because I know a lot of people are not like me.
 
Kframe said:
I never said she cant go to those things, only that establishing emotional closeness with another man is off limits.

and you did ignore them by not addressing the fact I have brought up repeatedly. It really is simply, increasing emotional intimacy increases the risk of sex. It is best to avoid such temptations if you respect yo ur partner.
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And i keep pointing out that if your woman is inclined and wanting to cheat you are doing NOTHING by trying to control her friends as the work place is a place were most affairs start and she will be there 8 plus hours 5 days a week.

If someone is intent to steal stuff and you can control them so they cannot steal from restaurants are you dumb enough (well you probably are) to think you are doing anything when they can still rob many places that are typically robbed more. You are literally doing nothing to stop them.
 
Kframe said:
More research saying what common sense has been saying all this time. Men and Women can not just be friends.
https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/men-and-women-cant-be-just-friends/

https://www.huffingtonpost.ca/debra-macleod/opposite-sex-friendship_b_6646482.html
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Wow. I've argued against you before on this forum and left thinking you had both the intellect and emotional maturity of a 13 year old and you cement it here. You really are simple.

Do you think we cannot google articles that say men and women can be friends? Do you think even within your articles it says it is possible?

Do you really believe 100% of male/female friendships end up in sex because neither person can say no?
 
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shinobimusashi said:
I've been on both sides of the fence being cheated on and being with women who are married/boyfriend etc, It's just science and chemistry, womens pussies burn so hot sometimes and their hormones rage to the point it takes over their moral judgement and instincts, any woman that is remotely attractive has a swarm of men trying to get it desperately plotting and scheming to make it happen all it takes is time and pressure. This is why men aren't meant to "settle down" with one woman, I just don't believe mother nature intended for it to be that way, if it was if love was a real thing like in the movies and songs human beings would have gone extinct a long time ago, it's survival of the fucking fittest in this world, that's the reality.
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This leads to an entirely new debate.

One may also argue that "love" leads to strong family units that ensured our survival.

Also, there is a lot we do that goes against biology, one of the defining features of our species is our ability to suppress our biological urges.
 
If she really wants to cheat on you, she will do it. There is no way to stop her.

You can't keep her locked in 24/7.

She needs a healthy life where she has both male and female friends. Same goes for us. Wife shouldn't bitch about us having friends who are girls. Of course everything has it's limits so if they are hanging out too much or acting weird then you should check it out but if you know your girl/wife you can notice changes in her rather fast.

I'm lucky to have a girl (soon to be wife next month) who has a normal approach to all this but she is still surprised I'm not trying to control her or ban her from having male friends. She had cases of possessive boyfriends in the past but I trust her and she appreciates that.
 
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MikeMcMann said:
Wow. I've argued against you before on this forum and left thinking you had both the intellect and emotional maturity of a 13 year old and you cement here. You really are simple.

Do you think we cannot google articles that say men and women can be friends? Do you think even within your articles it says it is possible?

Do you really believe 100% of male/female friendships end up in sex because neither person can say no?
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Yet you have done not one thing to provide any form of hope, any thing any guy can do. Same shit that doesn't work. Put in the time, look decent, positive environment at home, yet all that happens and cheating still happens. Yet none of your baloney worked and you still cling to it.

No, I don't think men and women can be friends. Not now, not ever.
 
Saying 'no' comes across almost like prohibition of...anything. I'd almost rather be cool with it and observe how often it's happening and with whom, that way I can say "Hey, you've been spending a lot of time w/ 'Dude', is everything OK with us?" than to be like 'no' only to have her having a "girl's night out" with a guy named Mark from work so she can tell him about how controlling I am.

Kframe said:
FUCK one dude in this thread already said that the married women he fucked were well loved and not underserved, yet they still cheated..
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Sure, but what exactly does that mean? Does 'they were well loved' mean that they were catered to and given all that they asked for? Maybe they weren't getting f****** the way they like it, or the guys were very vanilla. There are just so many variables to this whole thing. I say this because I'm a hound when I want to be, but once I establish that the woman is good as a friend, but not someone I want to be around day in and day out intimately, then it's very easy not to cross that line.

That said, I understand how the married guys with kids and the like would see this as a glaring Red Flag (as would I) when time is at a premium.

Kframe said:
No, I don't think men and women can be friends. Not now, not ever.
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At all?
 
Kframe said:
Yet you have done not one thing to provide any form of hope, any thing any guy can do. Same shit that doesn't work. Put in the time, look decent, positive environment at home, yet all that happens and cheating still happens. Yet none of your baloney worked and you still cling to it.

No, I don't think men and women can be friends. Not now, not ever.
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When you say I "have not done one thing to provide any form of hope, anything a guy can do" what you mean there is I have not pointed to any area you can control your S.O into fidelity. And you are right as I do not believe you can control that. What you can do is make her want to be loyal because she does not want to risk her relationship with you. And if you can see why you might control your own behaviour so as not risk your relationship with her then you should be able to understand why she might do the same.

But if you are the type of guy who cannot control himself then I get why you would be paranoid. In my experience the guys who are most negative about women always cheating were the guys who cheated the most.
 
MikeMcMann said:
When you say I "have not done one thing to provide any form of hope, anything a guy can do" what you mean there is I have not pointed to any area you can control your S.O into fidelity. And you are right as I do not believe you can control that. What you can do is make her want to be loyal because she does not want to risk her relationship with you. And if you can see why you might control your own behaviour so as not risk your relationship with her then you should be able to understand why she might do the same.

But if you are the type of guy who cannot control himself then I get why you would be paranoid. In my experience the guys who are most negative about women always cheating were the guys who cheated the most.
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Yet none of this prevents cheating. Not one bit. Proof is in the statistics. I was not talking in any way about controlling being my hope. I was looking for any hope. None of the above shows any promise of working.
 
Kframe said:
Yet none of this prevents cheating. Not one bit. Proof is in the statistics. I was not talking in any way about controlling being my hope. I was looking for any hope. None of the above shows any promise of working.
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are you afraid of being cheated on personally?
 
Kframe said:
Fear is to strong a word. I am always cautious though. I don't trust anyone to be honest, been failed to many times.
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well you are married dude. I mean thats why i probably part of why I wont marry a chick. I don't trust many people either.
 
Seeing as we have a open marriage and both of us knew we liked the swing life style. Ya I am ok with it.
 
Jimmy Jazz said:
well you are married dude. I mean thats why i probably part of why I wont marry a chick. I don't trust many people either.
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Well, I know one thing. If I somehow end up single again I wont get into another marriage. It's not worth it.
 
Kframe said:
Yet none of this prevents cheating. Not one bit. Proof is in the statistics. I was not talking in any way about controlling being my hope. I was looking for any hope. None of the above shows any promise of working.
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M'eh you are too dumb to converse with.

Nothing you have said PREVENTS cheating. Controlling your S.O so she does not socialize with a Male friend DOES NOT prevent cheating. You literally have to be the dumbest person on the planet if you think you have or are preventing cheating and as I said prior I feel sorry for you as you must cry yourself to sleep in the fetal position thinking of your S.O at work as you CANNOT PREVENT cheating while she is there.

Just stop. Stop saying stupid stuff. You offer nothing that prevents cheating. You have no answers for it. You just lie to yourself and convince yourself that if you can control one tiny aspect then you have somehow done something and you have not.
 
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