Craziest person you ever dated/banged

Fedorgasm

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My GF used to ask me to leave my worn shirt at her house on the nights I didn't stay at her place so she could sleep with it and it would have my scent on it so she felt like I was there.

Then when I dumped her I took all my belongings home, including all my shirts. A few days later my car got broken into and the only thing that was stolen was my jacket. I had other things in there that a thief would've likely taken, but no, just the jacket. I confronted her about it and she denied doing it, but I know she did.

What kind of craziness have you experienced?
 
Nothing too crazy for me. A weird one was when I hooked up with a girl a few times, was very clear this was just a hook up.

Anyway she wanted to go out one night and i said no, she cracked the shits, telling me how I'd made her feel cheap and all of this stuff. It did actually make me feel bad but I'd been explicit with her it was just a casual encounter, don't think I did anything wrong.
 
What kind of craziness have you experienced?
My ex would go with me to my softball games, and drink with my friends wives the whole game. Then on the way home accuse me of liking one of their wives even though I never interacted with them outside of saying hi at our games.

I hooked up with a bartender once who told me she was single. Her phone was dead by the morning so I gave her my charger. She charged her phone then asked for my address so her kids dad could come pick her up. I said negative but I'll drop you off. So I dropped her off at this apartment complex with a dude standing on the lawn looking pissed off. He found me on FB a few weeks later and messaged me, I said talk to her she told me she was single. Never heard from him again.

Another one. Before I dated this girl in college, we met and realized we were both commuting to school so we started commuting together. She had moved to the Bay Area from way up north with her high school boyfriend and they broke up. So she didn't know anyone down here and he didn't either. He'd literally park outside her apartment for hours at a time daily, trying to talk to her whenever she'd leave. She was hot and I almost felt bad for him. At first I was worried he'd try to kill me but after a while he seemed harmless.
 
A bar I used to frequent had a cute bartender who asked me out. Met her at a club and we had a good time. Exited the place and I walked her to her car and it had a smashed windshield. She called the cops to file a report and when they came they arrested her because she had outstanding warrants. Took her away in handcuffs and I gave her a little wave. Ended up sleeping with her a few days later so all was good.
 
A girl I banged years ago borrowed my Weezer - Pinkerton CD before we porked. I broke it off with her and she called me four times between 2am and 4am one night. She was all nuts and shit on the phone and it was pissing me off.

I knew her for like 10 days and she had no idea where I lived (I lived in a big city) but I guess I was wrong. Around 7am she knocked on my apartment door. She had no car and lived a good 20 minutes from me. I answered it and immediately took her to my car to drive her home. I pretended I was happy to see her because I thought she might cut my dick off.

I dropped her off and she handed me the Weezer CD case and a fucking loaf of banana bread she said she had baked for me last night. Fuck sakes.

I got home and threw the bread in the dumpster and opened the CD case up and found a goddamn Hootie and the Blowfish CD inside. I didn’t care, no chance I was going to get in touch with her after.

Crazy bitch but she could fuck like a banshee.
 
Asian chick

Never been with an Asian chick, wish i had have, too late now as a married bloke. I've heard they really look after their man (both in the sack and in the kitchen) but if you fuck them around they can come down on you like a ton of bricks.

(Speaking in generalisations of course)
 
This girl I dated peed in my R2D2 garbage can. She was so hot though. I was really like WTF when she did it the second time. We ended up breaking up because she was kinda crazy. That squirting stuff also gets real old real fast. She needed to do some pelvic floor exercises or something.
 
On a first date after meeting some girl at a bar (junior year in college) we were fooling around and she pulled a package of condoms out of her purse thingy. I'm no prude... but I'm also not going to bang a gal that I'm on a first date with who brings her own condoms.

So I told her "I think we need to know each other better before we do that...".

She then acted like I passed some test of hers, which was just her cover for being embarrassed. And she went on to make my life hell for the handful of weeks that we dated.
 
Never been with an Asian chick, wish i had have, too late now as a married bloke. I've heard they really look after their man (both in the sack and in the kitchen) but if you fuck them around they can come down on you like a ton of bricks.

(Speaking in generalisations of course)
There's stereotypes for a reason man. They are loyal as hell but are insanely jealous and prone to violence. Had one wing a unopened beer can right at my dome for looking in the direction of another woman.
 
Asian chick
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I went out with a girl I knew for a while from college. She was actually an amazing person. The first few dates we went on, she told me about how she wants me to meet her grandma and how her grandma pretty much raised her. It was a very touching story. She went on to tell me how she won't date me if her grandma doesn't like me, of course she was joking, but she said how much her grandma's opinion means to her. Well, one day she picked me up to finally meet her "grandma". She had a basket lunch and a cooler with drinks in it, so I figured we were going on a picnic. Nope, we went to the cemetery! Her grandma had been dead for four YEARS! It was really hard for me to kind of blow her off after that, because I felt like a horrible person. I didn't end it solely because of the grandma situation but it was clear she had issues with losing someone that she deeply loved and obviously meant the world to her. At that time of in my life, I just didn't wanna deal with it.
 
I dated a girl who during a heated argument jumped out of my truck while we were driving. Somehow she rolled out and got on her feet running away like an action hero.

I went on a date with a chick who told me she was a suspect in a murder right before asking if we could go upstairs. Scariest bang ever. I later found out she had given me a fake name so who knows ?
 
A bar I used to frequent had a cute bartender who asked me out. Met her at a club and we had a good time. Exited the place and I walked her to her car and it had a smashed windshield. She called the cops to file a report and when they came they arrested her because she had outstanding warrants. Took her away in handcuffs and I gave her a little wave. Ended up sleeping with her a few days later so all was good.

LMAO
 
My GF used to ask me to leave my worn shirt at her house on the nights I didn't stay at her place so she could sleep with it and it would have my scent on it so she felt like I was there.

Then when I dumped her I took all my belongings home, including all my shirts. A few days later my car got broken into and the only thing that was stolen was my jacket. I had other things in there that a thief would've likely taken, but no, just the jacket. I confronted her about it and she denied doing it, but I know she did.

What kind of craziness have you experienced?
You're lucky she didn't take your weiner and bronze it into a toy.
 
Just got officially divorced last month. Ex wife ended up suffering from depression, anxiety, and was emotionally a psychopath. No kids so clean split but it was weird watching her downward spiral. Some of the stuff that happened in her childhood she didn't admit till later on and it was stuff that you cannot reverse without professional help. Me and my 2 parents tried a medical intervention with her, and she refused. If we had kids, I would have probably had enough proof to show the court that she was crazy and that she either didn't need full custody or needed a psychiatrist. Not going to post anything too graphic but I'll leave in the spoiler tags a moderate example of someone whose actually legitimately crazy.

Went and visited my sister. Her and her 2 kids are actually the reason why I originally met my wife. Oldest of her 2 kids is slightly autistic. Went home and told my wife that I saw my sister and that oldest kid told me how much she misses her and how she was happy when she played candy land with her. My wife gives me an emotionless death stare and says "yeah well she's always happy because she's a fucking retard" and then slowly turns her head to the TV and zones out with a blank stare. A 7 year old child telling me that she enjoys quality time with my wife is what caused that response........
 
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