I have discovered the perfect martini recipe

[Fedorgasm]

So I've always liked martinis. Especially dry ones. And the ingredients are simple... Dry vermouth, gin, green olive. That's it.

I used to put maybe an ounce of vermouth in it. But slowly over time I've been using less and less.

And tonight I discovered I was completely out of vermouth. But being a resourceful Sherdogger with a 10 inch wang, I adapted and was able to make my martini anyway.

How did I accomplish this amazing feat of mixology?

Simple. I just said "fuck vermouth"

And I made my martini with only 2 ingredients: Gin, olive... That's it

And it was the fucking best thing I ever tasted. And you know what? The second one was even better. And the third was even better than that. I'm even looking forward to tasting it again when I puke. That's how amazing it was .

Simplicity, Bros. Sometimes it's better.

I wonder what other foods get better when you remove an ingredient. Jelly sandwich? Pepper with no salt? Dry cereal?

It's all possible now. It's like a whole new world has opened up to me.

 

[BisexualMMA]

Sometimes I make my chili without the apples, tuna fish, eggplant, pickles and lettuce.

 

[jeff7b9]

Cold alcohol in a fancy glass.

As a former bartender I can confirm this is what most people want when they order a martini.

If all the dry vermouth in the world disappeared or got switched with water, maybe 6 people would even known something happened. Nobody likes that shit.

 

[owen_taggart]

Cold alcohol in a fancy glass.

As a former bartender I can confirm this is what most people want when they order a martini.

 

[jeff7b9]

And shake the shit out of it.
Makes it really cold and a little bit frothy.

 

[MDoza]

BLT without the LT is good.

 

[chill doggie]

Pretty sure Winston Churchill beat you to the punch on this one.

 

[fingercuffs]

So I've always liked martinis. Especially dry ones. And the ingredients are simple... Dry vermouth, gin, green olive. That's it.

I used to put maybe an ounce of vermouth in it. But slowly over time I've been using less and less.

And tonight I discovered I was completely out of vermouth. But being a resourceful Sherdogger with a 10 inch wang, I adapted and was able to make my martini anyway.

How did I accomplish this amazing feat of mixology?

Simple. I just said "fuck vermouth"

And I made my martini with only 2 ingredients: Gin, olive... That's it

And it was the fucking best thing I ever tasted. And you know what? The second one was even better. And the third was even better than that. I'm even looking forward to tasting it again when I puke. That's how amazing it was .

Simplicity, Bros. Sometimes it's better.

I wonder what other foods get better when you remove an ingredient. Jelly sandwich? Pepper with no salt? Dry cereal?

It's all possible now. It's like a whole new world has opened up to me.

That isn't a martini. I have ended up buying a house with a gigantic home bar...I've been experimenting like you wouldn't believe.

 

[TheTickG]

So I've always liked martinis. Especially dry ones. And the ingredients are simple... Dry vermouth, gin, green olive. That's it.

I used to put maybe an ounce of vermouth in it. But slowly over time I've been using less and less.

And tonight I discovered I was completely out of vermouth. But being a resourceful Sherdogger with a 10 inch wang, I adapted and was able to make my martini anyway.

How did I accomplish this amazing feat of mixology?

Simple. I just said "fuck vermouth"

And I made my martini with only 2 ingredients: Gin, olive... That's it

And it was the fucking best thing I ever tasted. And you know what? The second one was even better. And the third was even better than that. I'm even looking forward to tasting it again when I puke. That's how amazing it was .

Simplicity, Bros. Sometimes it's better.

I wonder what other foods get better when you remove an ingredient. Jelly sandwich? Pepper with no salt? Dry cereal?

It's all possible now. It's like a whole new world has opened up to me.

One of my favorite drinks is freshly made Gatorade. Except, you don't use any of the Gatorade mix. You also replace the water with whiskey. It's a really good sports drink.

 

[fingercuffs]

One of my favorite drinks is freshly made Gatorade. Except, you don't use any of the Gatorade mix. You also replace the water with whiskey. It's a really good sports drink.

Proper giggle.