I don't know how much longer I can take this

mozfonky said:
Aren't you the music producer guy? Go produce some tunes, it'll take your mind off things.

I went to Portland about 10 years ago, it was actually very nice and almost identical to seattle, the one difference was there was no "Seattle Freeze" people were actually friendly. Now, I hear it's exactly like seattle with all the homeless and protests.

I had to leave, I fucked around and went to forest grove, I really didn't have a license at the time, nothing major, just a seatbelt ticket that I never paid, so.., got more tickets. but forest grove seemed backasswards enough to me, move there man. They stopped me for absolutely nothing just like a redneck town would.
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When I was a young man (18 years ago) I drove to Forest Grove from Lebanon to meet a chick that I had been having a payphone relationship with after I had met her in Idaho a few months before.

Was driving the wrong way down a One way street and the local cop pulled me over. I think he was either a nice guy or gay, as he let me off without a ticket or warning after hearing my accent which was pretty thick at the time (couldn't order at drive-thrus as cunts couldn't understand me).

After that, went a banged her in a parking lot in the work F-350. Ended up becoming my wife. The End.
 
I dig it homie. My life has been fucked the last year or two as well. All you can do is just do you and keep playing the game for a win.
 
Oregonmma said:
I've had so much pain in the last year or so. Lost my significant other that I thought was my life partner. Got abused by another women for a month or so before I left her. Met another women who is absolutely amazing and I thought she might be who I was supposed to be with and I overheard her talking with her friend saying how she doesn't know how her ex bf will feel when she starts dating his friend (not me).

I've never cried so much in the past year and idk how much more I can take. I feel so pathetic even talking about this because this is something I've never experienced before. I don't even know where to go from here. I've been getting drunk and high everyday for the past few weeks cause that's the only thing that will help the pain.
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Dude stop trying to find a chick and just work on yourself for a couple years. Being alone isn't going to kill you and you should come out the other side much stronger. Again let me repeat, stop chasing women and fix yourself. Therapy, exercise, advance your career skills, etc.
 
I'll be my broken record self anytime a similar topic comes up - start a serious meditation practice. A deep seated, unshakable sense of peace and happiness, beyond anything you knew was possible, is right in front of your face. Meditation allows you to slowly start to drop all the things in your life that are preventing you from seeing it.
 
dirtypablo said:
I'll be my broken record self anytime a similar topic comes up - start a serious meditation practice. A deep seated, unshakable sense of peace and happiness, beyond anything you knew was possible, is right in front of your face. Meditation allows you to slowly start to drop all the things in your life that are preventing you from seeing it.
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I need meditation in able to meditate. I envy anyone who can, my head is too busy to be able to, I bet you get a solid 8 hours sleep a night as well.
 
After my divorce my brother took me to Yukon Territory in Canada for 3 months gold panning (zero on 1500 acre lease we had) then I went Rocky training session after he lost to Apollo Creed for 9 months to improve myself no contact really. Fuck those bitches until you're right IMO
 
Work on yourself. If you are a catch then the only one missing out is all the chicks who could of had you but blew it for whatever reason (even if just their own stupidity/short sightedness). Billions of women in the world so no need to get hung up over a couple.
 
fingercuffs said:
I need meditation in able to meditate. I envy anyone who can, my head is too busy to be able to, I bet you get a solid 8 hours sleep a night as well.
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This is because you misunderstand what you're supposed to be doing/what should be happening in meditation. You can't clear your head of thoughts - thoughts appear in your mind all on their own. What you're trying to do is not get lost in them. So you pick an object of focus, usually the breath, and just focus your mind on it- counting in and out up to ten is usually helpful. Notice and feel the sensations in the body as you breathe in and out. You might not make it to 5 before a thought appears and you get swept away by it. Five minutes later you realize you've been lost in thought for the last few minutes - great! You recognized you were lost in thought. Now back to the breath. Again, you might only get a couple breaths before you're lost again - that's perfectly fine! When you notice you're lost, recognize it, then go right back to the breath. Don't expect no thoughts or get frustrated that you're having them - what you're really trying to do is improve your ability to recognize when you're lost in thought, and improve your ability to maintain concentration on an object of focus. Just keep practicing, and as you keep coming back to the breath, you'll eventually notice that you're able to get back earlier and earlier, until eventually you see thoughts as just thoughts almost immediately, and they don't carry you away.
 
dirtypablo said:
This is because you misunderstand what you're supposed to be doing/what should be happening in meditation. You can't clear your head of thoughts - thoughts appear in your mind all on their own. What you're trying to do is not get lost in them. So you pick an object of focus, usually the breath, and just focus your mind on it- counting in and out up to ten is usually helpful. Notice and feel the sensations in the body as you breathe in and out. You might not make it to 5 before a thought appears and you get swept away by it. Five minutes later you realize you've been lost in thought for the last few minutes - great! You recognized you were lost in thought. Now back to the breath. Again, you might only get a couple breaths before you're lost again - that's perfectly fine! When you notice you're lost, recognize it, then go right back to the breath. Don't expect no thoughts or get frustrated that you're having them - what you're really trying to do is improve your ability to recognize when you're lost in thought, and improve your ability to maintain concentration on an object of focus. Just keep practicing, and as you keep coming back to the breath, you'll eventually notice that you're able to get back earlier and earlier, until eventually you see thoughts as just thoughts almost immediately, and they don't carry you away.
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I do appreciate your response. My other half tried with me years ago and I just couldn't. He was a second dan in nunjuitsu and was so in tune with his head he knew when his coach was behind him just out shopping with his then wife unexpectedly. I'm just a lost cause. I do know it would do me the world of good so I'm not intentionally trying not to.

It would help so much with my sleep issues for a start.
 
fingercuffs said:
I do appreciate your response. My other half tried with me years ago and I just couldn't. He was a second dan in nunjuitsu and was so in tune with his head he knew when his coach was behind him just out shopping with his then wife unexpectedly. I'm just a lost cause. I do know it would do me the world of good so I'm not intentionally trying not to.

It would help so much with my sleep issues for a start.
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My advice? Try again. Commit to doing it 15 minutes a day for 30 days, regardless of how it goes. Worst case scenario you waste 15 minutes a day lost in your head for a month. I'll happily give you feedback if you have questions after trying for a few days.
 
Sorry to hear this

You have to spend some time by yourself for a while. Take care of your physical, mental, and emotional state before you try to enter another relationship. Sure you'll be lonely but you'll realize you're stronger than you think you are.

Too many people want to dive into new relationships especially if their ex has already moved on with someone else. And if you guys know a lot of the same people, you'll hear them talk about the new couple constantly and it'll just make you feel worse each day.
 
pugilistico said:
Get therapy, work out, meditate, take some shrooms, and stay away from dating.

Start traveling. People come and go. Learn to appreciate them but also let them go.

I've had a similar story to yours so I get it. I've cleansed myself. I don't care about dating and sex anymore so it's a nice bonus if it happens but I don't look for it at all. There are so much bigger things in life.

Don't spiral into drinking and other addictive behaviors. If you don't work on yourself, you'll find yourself in the same patterns.
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Well said….if we are not working on ourselves, we are loosing ground potentially slipping into self destructive behaviors..
 
You're good, homie. Cry if you feel like crying. Even if you feel pathetic doing it. It happens. You'll feel better.
 
In one year you've attached your emotional well being to three other people. Sounds like your identity hinges on being a part of a unit. You may not be needy, but that could definitely come across like you are. And that can definitely scare women away who don't want to have any dependants.
 
SoSo said:
When I was a young man (18 years ago) I drove to Forest Grove from Lebanon to meet a chick that I had been having a payphone relationship with after I had met her in Idaho a few months before.

Was driving the wrong way down a One way street and the local cop pulled me over. I think he was either a nice guy or gay, as he let me off without a ticket or warning after hearing my accent which was pretty thick at the time (couldn't order at drive-thrus as cunts couldn't understand me).

After that, went a banged her in a parking lot in the work F-350. Ended up becoming my wife. The End.
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I love how much reverence you have for your wife.
 
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