Inheritance

[Treeloy]

So when my dad died he left everything to my mom and nothing really for us kids.

My dad was the earner in the family.
I think he probably assumed my mom would take care of everyone in terms of inheritance one day.

Well, soon after my dad died, my mom got a new boyfriend and shes just blowing through all the money.

Expensive trips multiple times a year, expensive dinners, drinking, retired 5 years early after only working part time for years before that, cosmetic surgeries, brand new suv etc.

She sold her house and is buying a new one with the boyfriend.

By the time shes gone, everything our family has ever worked for will be sold off for vacations etc.

No money left for us, nothing to really give to the next generation.

Me and one of my sisters struggle. I dont drive and I sacrifice a lot just to get by. My sister has a partner but they are even worse off than me.

Even though its not my money, I get angry watching my mom waste all my dads money. She gave us a few thousand after he died but not much.
She pretty much kept it all.

She did make upgrades to our rental house where I live, but she hired her new boyfriends pals, they did shit work and its all crumbling apart.
I told her to hire a pro but she wouldnt listen.

I cant help but be angry. My sisters tell my mom to blow all the money and she deserves it. How does she "deserve" to blow all my dads money on herself?

None of my siblings are having kids, and im the only one who was interested. Our family line ends with me now.

The thing is, im not having a kid and having to start our entire family wealth from scratch.

In a few years our family wealth will be gone because my mom is spending it all. Its only a matter of time before she sells the rental for more vacation time and Ill have to look for a new place. She wants to sell it now.

I just think how differently I would act in the same situation. I would help my
struggling kids.

Now I dont expect help, but I just cant help but notice the difference in mentality.

Do you think its fine that she basically spent everything our family line has ever worked for, for generations, on herself?

My sisters seem to think it is. I think its fucking ridiculous.

Again, im not expecting a handout and if I never get a dime so be it, I just think its fucked to do that.

Opinions?

 

[Krixes]

This stuff can tear families apart....

 

[Medulla Omoplata]

Talk to her about it and then get over it. It's not your money, unfortunately.

 

[PG29 red0 Jr]

Maybe it is for the best your families line ends.

It's not your money, why don't your worry about your own finances?

 

[Medulla Omoplata]

Have you tried McDonald's new Fish and Chips? I bet that would cheer you up.

 

[Treeloy]

Maybe it is for the best your families line ends.

It's not your money, why don't your worry about your own finances?

Its the money my family has been building for generations and everything our family has to show for generations of hard work.

You think nobody should give any thought about it all being sold off and spent by one person in the family?

Well youre probably a fuckin retard

 

[PG29 red0 Jr]

Its the money my family has been building for generations and everything our family has to show for generations of hard work.

You think nobody should give any thought about it all being sold off and spent by one person in the family?

Well youre probably a fuckin retard..

You are a sponge. Try making your own way in life instead of being supported by others.

 

[Starck]

Its the money my family has been building for generations and everything our family has to show for generations of hard work.

You think nobody should give any thought about it all being sold off and spent by one person in the family?

Well youre probably a fuckin retard then.

Why don't you worry about your own finances? It's your mom's money to do with as she wants

 

[PG29 red0 Jr]

 

[Treeloy]

You are a sponge. Try making your own way in life instead of being supported by others.

Im a sponge yet everything I have/own was bought and paid for by me and I never ask for anythng. You're a clueless donk.

 

[JAEGERX]

well dude, respect your fathers wishes, your mom was probably a trooper for him for years and years and he assumed you kids would hang in the world on your own, so respect his final wishes and dont intevene, because your mom is spending that money because your dad said she could have it, thats it, just deal with that fact and move on

 

[ToxicShocker]

Im a sponge yet everything I have/own was bought and paid for by me and I never ask for anythng. You're a clueless donk.

you are literally asking for your dads money. Not now, but in the future

 

[Not A Theist]

My mother always told me "You don't live in a dead man's shoes." I've internalized this message. I could stand to inherit a great deal but, really, this is something someone else has earned. I don't believe I deserve any of it in virtue of some happenstance genetic tie. I've told her to enjoy her retirement after my father passes away, and I hope she does. If I get something it's not something I earned, so I'll thank my lucky stars, but I won't expect it.

Also, I don't buy the "I don't expect help." You say that while simultaneously saying "I am angry that I am not being given help because in that situation I would give help" and laying it on pretty thick that you think it's the right thing to do. So, basically, you "don't expect help" but you seem to be strongly suggesting that it's wrong that you're not getting it.

As for you, reason through your sense of entitlement to this money and figure out why you feel so entitled. That might help you resolve this issue.

 

[Treeloy]

you are literally asking for your dads money

You need better reading comprehension

 

[Alphaboy]

Unfortunate, it seems like your dad made in incorrect assumption.

With that said, I don't like to see families get torn apart over money.

 

[SammyPops]

Talk to her about it and then get over it. It's not your money, unfortunately.

I'll add that its pretty normal, even assumed in law, that all your dad's estate should go to your mom and not to any kids.

I thought this would be a good thread and not someone rustled.

 

[FascistDictator]

You're a shitty disgrace of a son for letting her dishonor the family like this.

Obviously your delusional father had no idea that his tramp of a wife would go and piss through all his bread with another man.

Go reclaim the family honor: Make your new stepdaddy refund every last cent or turn in your balls.

 

[Alphaboy]

Its the money my family has been building for generations and everything our family has to show for generations of hard work.

You think nobody should give any thought about it all being sold off and spent by one person in the family?

Well youre probably a fuckin retard

Yea, disagree with other people in the thread whining that it was your father's.

I think one of a father's primary jobs is to provide for his offspring. Anything my wife and I have will be passed down to our son/children.

 

[Scerpi]

This is definitely not an uncommon occurrence.

Most people have no idea how to value money and spend wisely. Most of the population lives pay check to pay check and are seemingly always on the edge. It doesn't matter if they make $50K per year or $500K per year.

If there's money available, they'll find something to spend it on. Even people who are rich suffer from this. Lotto winners, Sports athletes... actors.

Look at Johhny Depp and Micheal Jackson. When MJ died he was on the verge of bankruptcy because he would spend $1-$2 Million PER MONTH. He was having to tour again because he had somehow run out of money.

Look, just resolve yourself now that the money is gone. However, do try to talk sense into your mom. Try to explain to her that she's going to need that money to live on for the next 20 or 30 years if she's healthy. Try to hammer into her that WTF is she going to do when she blows through that money in a few years.

It probably won't work. But at least you tried.

 

[genecop]

Sad , common story, the problem started with your dad, he unfortunately did not have the insight to ensure you kids would be cared for.

Nothing to do but move on, make a good life for yourself, and don’t spend any energy on carrying grudges and having resentments...Good Luck.