P
Pugilistic
Guest
I have many female friends, some whom I love to death but it's strictly platonic. In my head, once I establish a line of friendship, I don't cross it. Friends are friends, and the women I have pursued are well outside my social circle. And these days I don't do much pursuing at all.
But here's this chick, who has thrown a curve ball at me, whom I have grown to respect in the short amount of time I've known her, who I find myself thinking about more than I do any of my other female friends.
When I first met her in the summer, I didn't really think much of her. She's not physically my type. Her personality is like every other LA chick I've met. She's probably young, stupid, and just wants to party all the time.
We only exchanged contact info because her and a bunch of others were trying to link up with us to party one night. We ended up texting a lot and hanging out more and going on a trip together, where I got to know her much better.
Now I know she's older than I first assumed, has quite a bit of knowledge and professional experience, and she actually parties way less than I do. Her personality is incredibly cool. She's just down to do anything and impressively composed in tough situations, unlike most women (and men) who are indecisive, needlessly picky, and flakey. She was also the only one of my friends to come out to support me when I did the poetry recital a couple weeks back. Not that I resent my other friends but that meant a lot to me. She's still really not my type on a physical level but she's quite cute and has a more impressive body than I expected.
I've been thinking about her quite a lot. Not about banging her (although that has crossed my mind too) but about hanging out with her. I find myself really looking forward to seeing her and chilling with her again, much more than I do with my other friends. I find myself checking my phone repeatedly throughout the day to see if she texted me. Which I think is insane. I only do that when there's some shit going down at work, or if there's a chick I really like.. What the fuck is wrong with me.
This development makes me think of how unpredictable our feelings can be (or maybe it's just mine). I didn't expect I would develop feelings for someone whom I consider a friend and isn't not my physical type, especially when I've been growing increasingly disinterested in any sort of sexual/romantic pursuit. How does attraction work anyway?
Not that any of this matters.
I'm not looking for advice on how to break out of the friendzone here as I want the opposite. As mentioned before, I don't cross the line of friendship. I'd rather maintain a potential lifelong friendship rather than pursue a bout of temporary emotions that will likely lead to heartbreak. There are also a lot of other reasons why I wouldn't pursue this. I have to manage my own feelings before it causes any trouble.
I will keep my distance from her until these feelings die down. The issue is really matter of how I go about it because I don't want her to think I dislike her. Pretend to be too busy? Use different body language around her? Tell her honestly?
Cliffs:
1. I have a crush on a friend
2. I intend to maintain the friendship
3. I may have to distance myself to manage my feelings
4. What's the best way to go about this?
But here's this chick, who has thrown a curve ball at me, whom I have grown to respect in the short amount of time I've known her, who I find myself thinking about more than I do any of my other female friends.
When I first met her in the summer, I didn't really think much of her. She's not physically my type. Her personality is like every other LA chick I've met. She's probably young, stupid, and just wants to party all the time.
We only exchanged contact info because her and a bunch of others were trying to link up with us to party one night. We ended up texting a lot and hanging out more and going on a trip together, where I got to know her much better.
Now I know she's older than I first assumed, has quite a bit of knowledge and professional experience, and she actually parties way less than I do. Her personality is incredibly cool. She's just down to do anything and impressively composed in tough situations, unlike most women (and men) who are indecisive, needlessly picky, and flakey. She was also the only one of my friends to come out to support me when I did the poetry recital a couple weeks back. Not that I resent my other friends but that meant a lot to me. She's still really not my type on a physical level but she's quite cute and has a more impressive body than I expected.
I've been thinking about her quite a lot. Not about banging her (although that has crossed my mind too) but about hanging out with her. I find myself really looking forward to seeing her and chilling with her again, much more than I do with my other friends. I find myself checking my phone repeatedly throughout the day to see if she texted me. Which I think is insane. I only do that when there's some shit going down at work, or if there's a chick I really like.. What the fuck is wrong with me.
This development makes me think of how unpredictable our feelings can be (or maybe it's just mine). I didn't expect I would develop feelings for someone whom I consider a friend and isn't not my physical type, especially when I've been growing increasingly disinterested in any sort of sexual/romantic pursuit. How does attraction work anyway?
Not that any of this matters.
I'm not looking for advice on how to break out of the friendzone here as I want the opposite. As mentioned before, I don't cross the line of friendship. I'd rather maintain a potential lifelong friendship rather than pursue a bout of temporary emotions that will likely lead to heartbreak. There are also a lot of other reasons why I wouldn't pursue this. I have to manage my own feelings before it causes any trouble.
I will keep my distance from her until these feelings die down. The issue is really matter of how I go about it because I don't want her to think I dislike her. Pretend to be too busy? Use different body language around her? Tell her honestly?
Cliffs:
1. I have a crush on a friend
2. I intend to maintain the friendship
3. I may have to distance myself to manage my feelings
4. What's the best way to go about this?
