What is the worst advice you've received?

[Stump]

I think the idea that advice is useful is bad advice.

Life is incredibly complicated. It's often a fools errand to reduce something to a simplistic caricature and make a decision based on how some general advice you decide fits this oversimplification.

It's also often a fools errand to look back on life to find key moments where you made decisions like following advice or not. Sometimes it's easy and straightforward to do this. Like, "I shouldn't have killed that guy." But in my experience, life is far too complicated most of the time to make these kinds of cause and effect proclamations.

The difficulties we face make us better people and allow us to know our deep values and strengths. The things we want are often only fleetingly enjoyable but regrettable or stagnating in the long term. Even things that seem good or bad within a decade can totally flip to their opposite in later years. And, of course, we aren't guaranteed any time on this planet, nor are we given knowledge about how things will turn out.

The advice to save money and build a retirement fund from an early age could be the key to unlocking an extremely meaningful life. Or, you could die tomorrow.

This is a good fable:
https://www.wordonfire.org/articles/fellows/the-story-of-the-chinese-farmer/

 

[clutchCAT420]

Some stupid idiot told me in my 20s to get married to my current gf. He had just got married and was looking for someone to be miserable like him. Dumbass, i dont talk to that fucker after that.
Broke up with my ex too after that.

10 yrs later met my current wife who is the love of my life and gave me an son. Dont know what happened to those losers. F them

 

[MichiganMMA1978]

Here, take one of these...

 

[THE Red Beard]

Guess he didn't amount anything on sherdog either.

It's his life's story lol

 

[mixmastermo]

Don't go back to school..

Since I received that advice and graduated my salary has more than tripled.

 

[Frode Falch]

You train to much. Train less. And not so often.

 

[Meatspin]

"You should play on the rugby team."

Spoiler: 10 shoulder surgeries later

with #11 booked for next month and #12 and possibly #13 this coming winter

ooof. sorry to hear dude

 

[Whippy McGee]

I was offered 2 jobs 15 years ago. One was with a big well known tech giant. The other was with a well established, but little known small technology company. I talked to an older, wiser, relative that had worked in a big Aerospace company forever and he told me to go with the Tech Giant. I couldn't do it and chose the small technology company. My decision was luckily aces. I've had a great 15 years, I now own part of the company and am the Executive VP. I would have been fighting the machine with the big tech company and unable to effect change as I do on a daily basis now.

 

[Contempt]

"Fake it 'til you make it."

What do you mean? That's excellent advice.

 

[Chesten_Hesten]

Don't buy that bitcoin, it's worthless.

 

[Blue_Ribbon]

Check out this website called Sherdog.

 

[Alphaboy]

I would argue that it is not organic to treat human interactions like that. There was a time when I believed it was “a numbers game” and I would go on 4-5 dates a week and stack up dates to meet and date as many women as possible hoping to meet “the one”.

I couldn’t remember birthdays, couldn’t remember what jobs or hobbies they had, couldn’t remember and didn’t even care who they were or what we talked about last time. I was just asking them out on dates because I thought that that was the “thing to do” … it wasn’t organic at all. A complete waste of time, money and energy. It’s actually kind of immoral, the more that I think about it.

I can respect your perspective, but I think it's important to keep expectations realistic... especially in today's Tinder, Microwave-dating, society. If you approach every woman like "she's probably the one," while some of them are looking to see how many free dinners they can get this week, you may be setting yourself up for disappointment.

 

[Alphaboy]

Nice guys finish last. Literally never the case if you keep plodding forward. No one does business with shady bad people for long. Honesty, honor, and fidelity get you far.

Whenever I've left a job, there's are always some well meaning idiots that caution you about leaving. As if you'll never get another job again, or that you'll regret it. Uh, no. Those people are (mostly) exactly where I left them.

Like any cliché, it has some modicum of truth!

If you're an upstanding person, you are inherently at a disadvantage against those who will do literally anything to win. Think of some of the most successful, powerful, people and their start.

Bill Gates... scumbag.
Mark Zuckerberg... scumbag.
Steve Jobs... the list goes on.

With that said, being an upstanding person and having a good reputation has its advantages too. Sometimes your reputation as an honorable person will get you far (as you said) and foster connections as well. I recommend it!

 

[blaseblase]

I think all of that "money isn't everything" talk is coping.

Evey time someone says:
"You can't take it with you when you die."

I think: How's that affect me now?

Seems dumb on its face, but I think the concept behind it is to not waste your entire life in pursuit of money. I think spending a specific part of your life in pursuit of money is absolutely worth it, but I look at middle aged or elderly people still in pursuit of the almighty dollar and feel like they are wasting their remaining time.

 

[Alphaboy]

"Good things come to those who wait"

I spent years in an awful job, thinking that my hard work would eventually pay off. I was a good worker but introverted, so I watched as I was passed over for promotion by guys who weren't as good but were friendlier with the boss.

I eventually took the hint and moved to a different group. Within 6 months I had gotten a big raise and a promotion. Doing much better now, but still feel like I lost years in that shitty situation.

Good things come to those who go out and get it! The only thing I'll take from that phrase is to not be impulsive, and to be patient.

I had a cousin who would always throw out the “YOLO” “you only live once” phrase in regards to everything, but the truth is you only die once, you live everyday.

You only live once as an excuse to blow all your money, live in the moment, be irresponsible....many of those people crashed and burned hard around 30.

It's funny, the phrase is meant to encourage risk taking and indulgence. Funny because it can also be interpreted as - you only live once so don't do anything too crazy, though it's never really used that way.

It's basically a millenial/Gen-Z version of: carpe diem.

 

[Alphaboy]

Been many moons but probably, "Be confident."

Confidence is built unless you're a dumb asshole who's confident for no particular reason

This is the textbook advice for people who don't really know what advice to give. It's applied to athleticism, academics, talking to women, etc.

Confidence doesn't exist in a vacuum. Be COMPETENT and all things shall follow accordingly. With that said, competence takes some time to build, so in the mean time give actionable advice. Gonna talk in front of a crowd: Tell the nervous person to slow down their speech, stand up tall, speak loud and don't mumble, etc. "Just be confident bro," is empty advice.

 

[JoeyJoeJoeJr]

I just pull out. I don't use condoms with my co worker. I'm not worried about it, it's fine.

 

[BEATDOWNS]

To not put on my seatbelt on a forklift.

Guy saw me go to put it on and is like no one does that here.

 

[DanSavage]

 

[Contempt]

From all my mates while I was being antisocial and working my ass off and studying through my 20's "Follow your passion, You only live once" etc. You know where they are now (or at last time I ran into them)?

Living with their parents or renting, in dead end jobs with zero prospects of ever changing that. Knowing very well that they will struggle their whole lives.

My advice would be: "Work your ass off when you're young to set yourself up for life".