Jebus, sometimes I feel like my siblings are some silver-spooned dipsticks

[Ballsaque]

No dumb ass.

They regard me as a dissolute living bum and disrespect me, despite my best efforts.

Said disrespect becomes intolerable, I'd prefer simply avoid the cunts...... but it can be difficult to avoid family.

You described no disrespect in your post though.


Why do you feel like they disrespect you?

 

[Gutter Chris]

I'm Really feeling the potential for a tonne of projection here.

Who knows though

I'm not trying to disrespect your perspective, just offering a counterpoint

I was sensing the same thing

Like they think he's white trash and he thinks they are "fancy"

Like it might be a 2 way street and the difference in lifestyle makes them unable to relate and irritate each other.

I got a sister like that. Took a lot to learn to just let it go and accept that we might both be right from our perspective. I am white trash and she is stuck up and very into that suburb shit ts family is likely into and we don't see the world the same at all. Lot easier to actually get along and make it work viewing it that way.

 

[filthybliss]

I was sensing the same thing

Like they think he's white trash and he thinks they are "fancy"

Like it might be a 2 way street and the difference in lifestyle makes them unable to relate and irritate each other.

I got a sister like that. Took a lot to learn to just let it go and accept that we might both be right from our perspective. I am white trash and she is stuck up and very into that suburb shit ts family is likely into and we don't see the world the same at all. Lot easier to actually get along and make it work viewing it that way.

don't call yourself "white trash"....being "trash" has nothing to do with income, all to do with character...

 

[Renard]

I'm not terribly surprised. People who pursue material gain above everything else tend to evaluate others based on their own measuring stick. Since they can't fathom that other people could have different priorities than theirs, they just assume the person just sucks at "playing the game." The game being the conventional paradigm of getting a job that gets you a lot of money, keeping your mouth shut and doing as your told to keep that money, not innovating on anything, not helping anyone, being highly adapted to a sick society. The me me me narcissistic lifestyle. Of course in the grand spiritual scheme, they're the ones wasting their life on things that don't matter at all. It's the level they're at though.

 

[Home_Slice]

You described no disrespect in your post though.

Why do you feel like they disrespect you?

Persistent bad attitude, I get radiating waves of aversion and contempt coming off them.

Just constant snide behaviour.

And like I said, they clearly poisoned their kids minds against me.

That shit........... I can't really overlook.

 

[wendelbudwhite]

May I ask why they view you as a sponge? Are you sponging off someone?

Doesn't seem like they had a silver spoon seems like you had all the same options as them but if I understand it are you saying you finished college and tied to become a pro MMA fighter?

 

[yamahacrasher]

You had the same opportunities as they did from the sound of what you're saying, unless there was a big shift in the family dynamic at some point, although you're close in age so that shouldn't really factor in. You chose to take a more difficult road to wherever it is you're going. That isn't their fault. They worked hard at school, and unless your parents gave them jobs, they had to work their way up in their respective fields to the point where they could have the lives they do. Now you want to bitch that they made the most of the opportunities they were given while, for whatever reason, you made the conscious decision to take a more difficult path? Doesn't sound like any of this is on your sisters to me.

 

[wolffanghameha]

My 2¢, without knowing you or your family: They won't know or understand some things about life or relate to your way of doing things. You won't know or understand some things either or relate to some ways in which they think. That's how life goes (although obviously some families mesh more easily than yours and some less easily). You find different people relate to different parts of yourself. Your sisters might not know or relate to some aspects of life, but others you have met or will meet in your life will - a bit like how a friend and a parent relate to you in different ways, but can both be positive relationships. You and your sisters can still love each other despite the differences or even despite not getting on in some ways.

I can definitely relate somewhat, although with extended family rather than siblings (as I have none). I know for a fact some of my relatives haven't been through some of my struggles or make incorrect assumptions about me, but it's not their fault. They probably think my life is easier than theirs in some ways and can't imagine I'd see it any other way...who's correct idk, but people don't need to be correct all the time anyway.
And I see how my younger relatives act and know that at the same age I'd have been smacked if I did 10% of what they did and that I had a totally different set of problems to them and had to fight long and hard for freedoms they were just given...I try to just be happy for them and glad they're happy (I've also experienced being on the receiving end of bitter older relatives when I was a kid, which sucked). Which is a lot easier when you're satisfied with other areas of your life and thus don't care as much about family stuff going how you want it to. If you let the hardships of your life make you cruel to others, then you're letting the hardships win over yourself.

 

[Contempt]

They're not bad folk.

I have two sisters, they're 42 and 40. I'm 38.

We meet for family dinner with my folks every couple months.

Each have two kids, a girl and boy. They're about 4 are 7 each. Young kids.

They both had good success with their studies and careers and went on to raise families.
I graduated college but quickly pursued traning teh UFC so my lifestyle went very differently to theirs.

I think they see me as some kind of sponge, dissolute living bum.

They've worked hard for what they have. They both make 6 figures but with expenses of living where they do, they have little throwing-around money.

I don't resent their lifestyles or who they are at all.

But I believe they resent mine.

And IMO they so overly indulge their kids quirky behaviour.

It seems all this conflicts, but anyways, fucking negative vibes. Post Easter Sunday gatherings.

Honestly sometimes I just want to smack each of them, their little bastard kids and say, "smarten up, you talk like s, and your shits all retarded".

Is this normal, based on relative outlook and lifestyle?

If "They've worked hard for what they have", how does that make them "silver spooned dipsticks" exactly?

They aren't the ones whining about you on a karate forum...

 

[Van Daz]

They studied hard, got good jobs, applied themselves, met partners, built families.

But their path was straight forward, laid out for them.

They didn't have to start at the bottom and hustle/struggle to find that path.

Me, my background was completely a-typical to my ultimate lifestyle so I've been hustling since 24 years of age.

I'm just sayin', they're extremely judgemental of me and it becomes a drag.

Maybe they have a lot of pressure raising kids & trying to keep their shit together. Have you thought they might just be jealous of you & your freedom?

If they are genuine pricks, then that's a them problem & don't stoop down a level. Can't choose family, but you can choose how you act. Also, no one is perfect, so love them & appreciate them, regardless of their faults.

Keep UFCing & wish you well, Sir.

P.S.....Now, if you do have to slap them, at least do it in a funny way.....

 

[davidlemonparty]

I was sensing the same thing

Like they think he's white trash and he thinks they are "fancy"

Like it might be a 2 way street and the difference in lifestyle makes them unable to relate and irritate each other.

I got a sister like that. Took a lot to learn to just let it go and accept that we might both be right from our perspective. I am white trash and she is stuck up and very into that suburb shit ts family is likely into and we don't see the world the same at all. Lot easier to actually get along and make it work viewing it that way.

You said it way better than me. That's what I was thinking

 

[Contempt]

We're very different people.

It creates aggravation.

Sounds like all the aggravation and resentment is coming from you dude...

The fact they judge me from their high horse....... yeah, I'd like to fuckin' smack them and their dipshit kids.

Confirmed.

 

[shunyata]

Brother, I'm hearing that you didn't stay in school.

And that your wife / gay life partner doesn't make the six figures allowing you train the ufc while having a day job.


Let's be real. You're probably too old to make it in the ufc, but you can still train it and maybe eventually teach it.

I recommend dating doctors/lawyers/nurses until you're financially stable, and going back for your own degree in your chosen profession.

Trust me, guy with a black belt in teh ufc, a masters degree, and a wife who makes teh six figures.

 

[Contempt]

They had it straight-forward.

Go to college, study, get a job, family, etc.

Normal life. Their path was laid out for them. They don't know struggle in the sense of having to think outside of the box.

Finishing college, but then going a completely different way entirely whereby one must basically start at the bottom and work upwards?

Unknown situations, adversity.

And then non-stop judgement from said siblings?

Fuck 'em both, is how I feel right now.

What are you talking about? They DID start at the bottom.

They "went to school, studied, got a job, family etc" They started at the bottom and worked for what they wanted. Do you honestly think all those things happened by accident?

You just sound bitter and angry that they worked for and achieved what they wanted to and you didn't.

I'm generally against the concept of therapy but damn dude, you have some issues to work through.

 

[Contempt]

...I don't want to be around these fuckers or their fuckface kids for a moment.

Based on the anger and bitterness you are displaying here, I am sure the feeling is mutual.

 

[Home_Slice]

May I ask why they view you as a sponge? Are you sponging off someone?

Doesn't seem like they had a silver spoon seems like you had all the same options as them but if I understand it are you saying you finished college and tied to become a pro MMA fighter?

I work just two days a week to focus on other things.

I think I said "dissolute lifestyle", not sponge?

I also still party with college girls and my life revolves around picking up girls, not having a long term relationship.

I pursued the path that brought me most happiness and I found to do so, I had to take an entirely different developmental journey.

So now we're very different people and they don't seem to like what I am.
In fact, they seem to hate it, and be very judgemental of it.

 

[Home_Slice]

What are you talking about? They DID start at the bottom.

They "went to school, studied, got a job, family etc" They started at the bottom and worked for what they wanted. Do you honestly think all those things happened by accident?

You just sound bitter and angry that they worked for and achieved what they wanted to and you didn't.

I'm generally against the concept of therapy but damn dude, you have some issues to work through.

lol, man STFU.

The life they have, they were born into.

They were encouraged to study academically, given opportunity and support to go to college and pursue a good career.

i.e. they didn't start at the bottom. They started at a much higher level and worked from there.

What I pursued, relatively, I personally started with shit.
I mean nothing.

End result is, like I said, an acutely different developmental process and now, for intents and purposes, a very different person from them.

We don't get on well. It sucks. I'm subject to judgement and condemnation.

Just as an example, one of my siblings also condemns overweight people, it's their problem apparently as they simply don't make an effort to eat and live healthy.

Just a gross oversimplification of reality.

 

[Home_Slice]

Based on the anger and bitterness you are displaying here, I am sure the feeling is mutual.

No shit.

I'm mirroring their feelings toward me.

But I didn't start it. They did.

 

[Contempt]

lol, man STFU.

The life they have, they were born into.

They were encouraged to study academically, given opportunity and support to go to college and pursue a good career.

i.e. they didn't start at the bottom. They started at a much higher level and worked from there.

What I pursued, relatively, I personally started with shit.
I mean nothing.

End result is, like I said, an acutely different developmental process and now, for intents and purposes, a very different person from them.

We don't get on well. It sucks. I'm subject to judgement and condemnation.

Just as an example, one of my siblings also condemns overweight people, it's their problem apparently as they simply don't make an effort to eat and live healthy.

Just a gross oversimplification of reality.

They are your siblings... you were "born into" the exact same life, they decided to work for what they want and have the good lives they EARNED, you didn't and you're clearly angry and bitter about it.

You are presumably well into adulthood at this point yes? It's time you put on your big girl panties and stopped blaming others for your failure as a man. You are NOT a victim.

You half ass it and work the bare minimum, which means you probably scrape by, have no money saved up for the future and have a life of poverty to look forward to. You're finally realising the many fuckups you've made and rather than owning up to it and making changes in your life, you are still blaming others like a little child.

They started at the bottom as well, unlike you, they worked hard and didn't stay there. Just grow the fuck up dude and stop whinging about the choices YOU made in life.

"Just as an example, one of my siblings also condemns overweight people, it's their problem apparently as they simply don't make an effort to eat and live healthy."

Your sibling is correct.

 

[Contempt]

No shit.

I'm mirroring their feelings toward me.

But I didn't start it. They did.

"But Mom, they started it!!!"

You still sound like an immature child that never grew up and learned to take responsibility for their own actions.