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You can use strength and you can be mean within reason i.e. not punching her in the stomach repeatedly but a little exploitation of pressure points. This is isn't BJJ, it's an arrest. I'd say that's a benefit of wrestling over BJJ, but there some schools of BJJ that preach hard-nose grappling similar to the wrestler's approach. Your school may need a little more aggression to be effective.if her only objective was to not be tapped and I wasn't being mean or using strength there is a good chance no. Jiu jitsu is about exploiting opportunities