Do You Abandon Your Children If You Discover They're Not Yours?

[dontsnitch]

Anybody who would walk away from kids they love and who love them is a dick. Period. Be mad at the mother. The kids clearly already have a terrible person as a mother. This is your opportunity to continue to be a role model, a Dad and to love them the same way you always have. They are the same kids. You are the same Dad. Nothing needs to change. As the father of an adopted kid I can assure that "blood" has little to nothing to being a "family."

I agree, but we can't ignore biology. There is a strong biological urge to reject everything and everyone here. It's the essence of this whole debate as far as I'm concerned.

 

[dontsnitch]

The "middle of the road thing" not in the list is to distance yourself from the mother, not the kids. If you have been a good father it will be damn near impossible to step away.

Yeah, it's just hard to make an adequate poll that's simple enough to be useful, but that doesn't lose the essence of the dilemma.

You sound like the 'carry on as if this new information is irrelevant', because I'm presupposing that we just ignore the mother for all intents.

 

[Gluteus Swag]

In Canada you'd be financial on the hook for them at that point. Hell, you date a woman who had kids before she met you long enough and you can be on the hook for child support.

The best strategy is a vasectomy + freezing sperm. Don't let the women know. If someone you're dating gets pregnant, get a sperm test to verify your vasectomy hasn't reversed and then dump them.

 

[Gluteus Swag]

Anybody who would walk away from kids they love and who love them is a dick. Period. Be mad at the mother. The kids clearly already have a terrible person as a mother. This is your opportunity to continue to be a role model, a Dad and to love them the same way you always have. They are the same kids. You are the same Dad. Nothing needs to change. As the father of an adopted kid I can assure that "blood" has little to nothing to being a "family."

Voluntarily adopting kids and involuntarily becoming a cuckold are different things

 

[Codpiece]

I'd definitely raise them as my own, I love kids from babies to teenagers so if I had raised a few for several years I couldn't turn my back on them. I have no idea how I'd cope with my wife cheating. That's a much tougher question.

 

[luckyshot]

I think of abandoning these little shits anyways. If I found out they were the product of some other dudes genetic jackhammer, I be like

 

[Fluffernutter]

Run away

 

[Rozko]

Does a prison term for defenestration of that whore count as abandonment?

Edit:
I would be gone. I would be too wounded/anger to treat the kids properly. The rage would make me to cold to be worth a shit to them. I also would likely lose the ability to love them because they are not mine on a basic level.

TL;DR
I am an asshole. Gone.

 

[HomerThompson]

This is the question that I'm wrestling with. I understand that it's evolutionary, and I understand that it's human nature to make this statement, but I can't shake the feeling that it's illogical to love them less. What we're saying is that love is not just about the person, but it's deeper than that.

Shouldn't we strive to rise above evolutionary biology?

Probably, but we're not there yet. I wouldn't abandon the kids, but they would be the embodiment of the ultimate betrayal that I have suffered. Not abandoning them outright is the best one can do(in aggregate, some people are legit cucks).

 

[Gandhi]

Hard question for some but after thinking about it for a minute I know what I would do.

I spent 10 years trying to have a child, including adoption.

We finally had 1 through ivf. He is my world.

I raise a kid for 4 years and he loves me I am sticking by him even if I divorce the wife. It of course depends on what the wife and other real dad are doing but if the kids need me and I can be there, I will be. It's not their fault and what's the point of even being alive if we can't make the life of the next generation a little easier.

 

[dontsnitch]

Pretty even opinions across the board, I'm loving this new poll-creating power I wield.

 

[Post 2 Decision]

Bonus scenario: One is a Muslim, one is transgender, one is gay, and one has downs

 

[ReAnimator Reagan]

This is inspired by this video @Edison Carasio posted in the meme thread.



The question is simple, and to keep it simple, I'm ignoring the relationship with the wife-- You've raised what you believe are your children for 4 years only to discover they're not actually your own offspring. What do you do?

Before you answer, I urge you to consider the children themselves. You've raised them as your own, and they love you. Likewise, you love them. They trust you as their father and are completely innocent. There's no doubt that if you leave, they'll be destroyed, and being 4, they may possible never fully recover.

Do you abandon them, do you still raise them as your own, or do you take a middle-of-the-road approach and distance yourself, but not completely?

I'm having a difficult time answering this question to myself, so I'd like to see where the WR stands.

In b4 literal cuck.

I sell them to Planned Parenthood so they can chop em into pieces and sell them on the flesh market for a pretty penny

Bonus scenario: One is a Muslim, one is transgender, one is gay, and one has downs

Make that shit into a Human Centiped, ffs! They all deserve to be the B.

This is inspired by this video @Edison Carasio posted in the meme thread.



The question is simple, and to keep it simple, I'm ignoring the relationship with the wife-- You've raised what you believe are your children for 4 years only to discover they're not actually your own offspring. What do you do?

Before you answer, I urge you to consider the children themselves. You've raised them as your own, and they love you. Likewise, you love them. They trust you as their father and are completely innocent. There's no doubt that if you leave, they'll be destroyed, and being 4, they may possible never fully recover.

Do you abandon them, do you still raise them as your own, or do you take a middle-of-the-road approach and distance yourself, but not completely?

I'm having a difficult time answering this question to myself, so I'd like to see where the WR stands.

In b4 literal cuck.

holy shit, that was Luke Thomas?????

 

[Crash Lance]

 

[Morning Star]

4 years is still young enough to move on. Would be a harder question if they were a teen or adult. Not the kid's fault but I wouldn't want anything to do with their whore mother and by extension them.

 

[Anung Un Rama]

tough question; depends a lot of emotion, more than responsibility -- because you don't have any real responsibility.
It would be cold to just drop the kid, but it may be for the best seeing as you're naturally going to grow more distant being in prison for killing her lying mother.

 

[Son of Jamin]

Not the childrens' fault so they shouldn't suffer more than they already have. So, yes, I would raise them like my own.

 

[Pwent]

Depends on how old they are and how much I love them TBH

I would feel no obligation and the anger I would feel at the mother would make me want to punish her whore ass for cheating but if I raised them long enough I could potentially just like being around them

 

[PrinceOfPain]

4 years?
That's not too long to cut your losses, get out of dodge and try to start a real family with someone who's not a raging piece-of-shit whore.

 

[brothir]

I was 4 years old when my father abandoned me and my mother (not because I wasn't his, but due to normal bullshit). It completely crushed me, and sunk me into a depression that lasted probably a year.

I don't know how the "not your father" aspect would modify my reaction. On some level, you would think it was equally saddening to suddenly learn that the person you thought was your father actually wasn't, and your average 4 year old will definitely need some time to process that. Heck, any average adult would need time to process that.

Hypothetically, if this was the reason my father had left us, as I am right now I would have forgiven him: by any reasonable account he would have been betrayed by my mother, and leaving her would be a very immediate and reasonable impulse. It's unfortunate that will mean also leaving the child in most cases.

Really, the mother is at fault here, and I actually think she should have an obligation to compensate the man for his time and money invested into children that he was misled to believe he had an obligation to take care of. That could again have a negative effect on the children, so that's another difficulty.

I don't think I could hold it against anyone if they left in this situation. Quite likely what I'd do myself: I have an unfortunate capacity for bitterness and vengefulness, so it's not improbable that I could turn myself completely cold to the children.

For clarification, I don't have any children myself and also don't want any. If I suddenly wanted a child, and had one, I could see myself staying.